A Star of Hope

Mike Clancy Is a Liar

2012-01-29T11:17:00.003-07:00

This originally was a comment left on Leila's excellent post about Mike Clancy's ineptitude, and she suggested I make it into a blog post of my own.

Well, he's done it again. Mike Clancy at the Arizona Republic has made a mockery of his profession, not to mention the truth, with another lame-ass article about the Catholic Church (specifically, the Church's reaction to the HHS mandate). Let's explore some of his more egregious falsehoods, shall we?

1. Why is Clancy unable to take five seconds to look up the definition of "abortion"?

...Olmsted ousted the hospital [St. Joseph's] from the Catholic family after a dispute about a medical procedure that Olmsted considered an abortion.

St. Joseph itself admitted that they "terminated an 11-week pregnancy". [Note the source of that link.] Abortion is defined as the termination of a pregnancy. Olmsted didn't "deem" it an abortion, St. Joe's itself and the DICTIONARY did! Is Clancy really that ignorant, or is he purposefully lying? I'm guessing the latter.

2. Where does the Catholic Church keep its time machine?

From the article:

The church has taught that birth control is 'intrinsically wrong' since 1968, around the time the pill came into widespread use.

See, according to Clancy, the Church first condemned contraception in 1968, and then Pope Paul VI travelled back in time, masqueraded as Pius XI, and wrote the encyclical Casti Connubii in 1930 that also reiterated the Church's teachings against contraception. And then, presumably, he went back in time again to 195 A.D. to write about it. Amazing, really, that the Church has the ability to time-travel that only Mike Clancy knows about.

3. Is Clancy aware of this fabulous new invention called "the Internet"? I wonder due to the lies from Clancy that are in these two paragraphs:

"According to Catholic News Service, bishops in nine of the nation's 195 dioceses are preparing letters to be read at Masses on Sunday encouraging churchgoers to lobby against the measure. Several others, including Archbishop Timothy Dolan of New York and retired Cardinal Roger Mahony of Los Angeles, have written or spoken against the mandate.

Of the group that has gone public so far, Olmsted appears to be the only one who has said specifically that Catholics should defy the law, according to the Catholic news agency."

Thanks to the Internet, I found, rather quickly, that many more than nine bishops have written or spoken about this issue. (I suppose in Clancy's little world of pseudo-journalistic integrity, one questionable CNA article - with no URL to said article provided - suffices as adequate fact-checking.)

At last count? TWENTY-THREE. Obviously Mike Clancy is as terrible at math as he is with telling the truth, because last time I checked, 23 > 9.

Also from the link above, and contrary to Clancy's claim, Olmsted is NOT the only bishop "advocating civil disobedience":

"Archbishop Timothy Broglio of the Archdiocese for the Military Services in the United States said, "We cannot - we will not - comply with this unjust law". (Note: The letter here is based on a form letter sent out by the USCCB, so similar letters will be seen at other dioceses. It is rather strongly worded and the bishops sending it out are basically saying, "it speaks for me." In some dioceses I'm reading that the bishop wanted it stuffed into bulletins or shared at Masses. Those using variations of this form letter include Archbishop Schnurr of Cincinatti, and Bishop McFadden of Harrisburg, and Bishop Sample of Marquette and probably many more.)"

4. Here's clear evidence that Clancy hasn't bothered to so much as do the basic, bare-bones research on Catholicism.

The Roman Catholic Church is the only significant denomination opposed to contraception.

Hey, Mike! Ever hear of the Eastern Catholic Church? They're also opposed to contraception. How about the Orthodox Churches? They allow condoms in special circumstances but are generally opposed to abortifacient contraception and sterilization. Many Protestant denominations oppose abortifacient contraception as well.

But you know what? It doesn't matter, because this is an issue about religious liberty, not contraception. As Kaitlin at More Like Mary, More Like me wrote yesterday,

[H]ow on earth can the government force a religious organization to pay for something that they believe will send its employees to hell?

I'm outraged. And you should be too. Even if you think contraception is the best thing since sliced bread. Even if you cannot begin to understand the reasons for the Church's teachings.

Can't you show me and my faith a little respect? Can't you give us the freedom to live and worship as we wish? Can't you see that employees of Catholic organizations have the option to work someplace else if they want birth control paid for? No one is forcing them to stay.

It doesn't matter if you don't understand. It doesn't matter if you don't agree. It doesn't matter if you think we're crazy/total whackos/going to hell/hypocritical zealots. What matters is that the government is infringing on our religious liberty in a big, big way.

What makes you think your beliefs aren't next?

If the Republic's sports editor wrote that the Texas Rangers won the 2010 World Series, or that Derek Jeter played for the Red Sox, he'd be fired in a matter of days. But Clancy can repeatedly lie about his subject matter and get away with it. It must be nice for him to be so embarrassingly inept at his profession but still have that kind of job security. I bet the only way he'd get fired is if he started reporting the truth.

Don't Be a Catholic Butt

2012-01-28T20:07:00.002-07:00

The following appeared in my parish's bulletin this weekend.

ANONYMOUS GRIPE

“What about after the baby shower? Will you support the child financially? How dare you!” (-as it was written, including underlines)

Instead of choosing to write a name and participate in praying for the unborn, this unsigned complaint was handwritten on one of our blue cards last weekend for the spiritual adoption of an unborn child. Obviously the person is in a great deal of pain and anger. Please add him or her to your prayers and others who are still angry for whatever reason whenever they hear the Catholic Church preach on legally protecting the unborn.

I do believe that the Catholic Church does a great deal for babies and families. Catholic hospitals, parishes and charities do tremendous good work. Obviously this person can’t see it. He or she points the finger at “you” but who is this unnamed “you?” The person who wrote the message is also part of the “you”, part of the Church that he or she is alleging does not do enough. In fact all of us are “you.”

We must of course respond with prayer and action to promote life as we constantly say, “from the moment of conception until natural death.” An unborn child must be defended and given dignity, but so must the born at whatever age, young or old.

Another person complained yesterday that, “No one else should have a say over my body; abortion is the mother’s decision alone.” This is a common misunderstanding. We are stewards of the Lord’s gifts. Our bodies do not belong to us; they belong to the Lord. And besides, an unborn child is not the women’s body anyway. It is growing inside her body, but it is not her possession. Children are never possessions; they are miraculous gifts from a loving God whether inside or outside the womb.

Of course we should do everything in our power to provide a child with a warm, welcoming and loving family and community with all the proper resources for good health, good education and a firm faith in God and his teachings. Could the Catholic Church do more? YES. Who is the Church? We are all part of the Church including those who complain and get angry at the Church. Jesus teaches us to love...love...love. Let’s all try to do our best to follow him in living the Gospel of Life.

I am deeply grateful to the 1233 people who turned in spiritual adoption prayer cards this weekend. — Fr Hans Ruygt

A little background:

Every January, on the weekend nearest the Roe v. Wade anniversary, my priest passes out pink and blue cards at each Mass. He requests that parishioners pick an unborn child to pray for, give a name to the child, write the child's name on a card, and put it in the collection basket. He also requests that we pray for these children we've spiritually adopted throughout the year, and he includes information about fetal development milestones in the weekly bulletin so parishioners can track the growth of their spiritually adopted child. In October or so, our parish holds a "baby shower" for these babies, in which parishioners bring in baby items to donate to a local CPC.

It is the spiritual adoption, held last week, that prompted the above gripes, and it is to those parishioners that this post is directed.

How dare he? How dare you.

How dare you suggest that children deserve to die because the Catholic Church is allegedly (in your closed, ignorant mind) not doing enough to help them?

How dare you use an event meant to encourage prayer and fasting for the unborn to advance your own ignorant, idiotic, openly anti-Catholic agenda -- at a Catholic Church, no less?

It is a flagrant myth that pro-lifers don't help mothers in crisis. Please do some research into this as you are apparently severely misinformed.

Have you ever heard the old slogan, "you're either part of the solution or you're part of the problem"? If you feel that the Catholic Church, and specifically our parish, is not doing enough to aid mothers in crisis, do something about it. Anonymous bitching and moaning in an offering basket will not help mothers in crisis! Nor will encouraging them to kill their children!

Rather than a nasty note to Father Hans, why not donate to Maggie's Place? I have tried to lead a pro-life group at St. Clare's, but I'm unable to do so due to time constraints. If you start one, I'll join and work as hard and as much as I am able in the service of the unborn and their parents.

As to the person with the nasty comment about it being "my body" -- a woman's bodily autonomy ends where her baby's body begins. It is a human rights violation to deprive an unborn child of his or her right to life. Not only is that Catholic doctrine -- which, if you're attending a Catholic Church, you should be living out and following faithfully! -- but it's also common sense. Non-religious pro-lifers defend life on these grounds.

Both of you need to seriously examine your attendance at a Catholic church. If you think the Church is wrong on the issue of abortion, then I must wonder why you are Catholic at all. If the Church is wrong about this, then what reason do you have to believe She is right about anything else?

When I concluded that my old denomination (ELCA) was wrong, I left it; I didn't stay within the faith that I believed taught error. It made no logical sense to adhere to a faith that promulgated incorrect teachings.

I'm not encouraging you to leave the Church, but I'm asking you to take a look at your reasons for being Catholic. If you're Catholic, you need to adhere to the teachings -- all the teachings -- of the one, holy, Catholic, and apostolic Church. You can't pick and choose which ones to follow like you're at a Chinese buffet trying to decide between broccoli chicken or lo mein. It's all or nothing.

We are all one Body but no one should be the butt. The mindset of "I'm Catholic, but I believe contraception is okay" or "I'm Catholic, but I believe abortion should be legal" is absolutely untenable in the Catholic Church.

Don't be a Catholic Butt. We have enough asses to fill the stable as it is.

7 Quick Takes Friday - January 27, 2012

2012-01-27T08:35:00.003-07:00

--- 1 ---

Collin, the kids, and I went to the Phoenix March for Life last Sunday! About 700 people came out and we had a great time. It was so wonderful to be among such young, enthusiastic people all celebrating life! We met up with Kara, who wrote a great recap. Here are the pictures I took:

getting ready to go

starting out

Mommy's little pro-lifer :)

crowd shot at the rally

more of the crowd

love the balloons!

My Violet (in the stroller) with Kara's little Tessa

Here is our family (plus Kara's Amelia, lol) with Bishop Olmsted, such a holy man and a great warrior for life!
He thanked us for being a witness for families.

Bishop Olmsted's homily at the Mass prior to the March was fantastic, by the way.

--- 2 ---

For an excellent recap of the non-coverage by the MSM, see Bad Catholic's Media Stupidity at the March for Life. At the Phoenix march, I saw a TV camera here and there but I didn't see any broadcast about it (if anyone knows otherwise, please inform me!).

--- 3 ---

My grandmother arrives tomorrow! Yay! I should probably get around to taking my Christmas decorations down tonight... might be weird to walk into our house and see the Christmas tree up. :)

--- 4 ---

This is going to be a great weekend to see family! On Sunday, two of Collin's aunts (one from ND, one from MN) will be in town, and we're going to meet up at the Surprise Community Park so we can visit while the kids run wild. I'm going to invite them over to see our house, too, as I don't believe either have ever been there. I can't wait!

--- 5 ---

Elanor's been asking a lot of questions about death and dying lately. Anyone have a good book recommendation (preferably one with a Catholic perspective)?

--- 6 ---

Gabriel was two months old yesterday! I can't believe it; time is just flying by. He has his two-month old well-baby checkup today. He's supposed to get vaccinations but I'm not sure if he will because he's had a bad runny nose the past day or two (yes, again - poor kid is only two months old but this is his second cold of his life!).

I was going to take a two month picture, but I forgot. I'll have to try and remember to do that tonight.

--- 7 ---

My first week back at work has gone well - better than I expected, actually - so thank you for any and all prayers in that regard. I'm glad it's Friday, though, and I'm looking forward to sleeping in past 5am the next two days!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Smiles! Smiles! Smiles!

2012-01-25T09:51:00.001-07:00

My heart just melts.

Back at work

2012-01-23T14:30:00.001-07:00

Daycare reports that Gabriel is doing well. No problems taking a bottle, thank goodness. Can't wait until the day is over and I get my baby back!

Trust Women?

2012-01-22T07:00:00.001-07:00

Many of the signs being held by Planned Parenthood supporters at the State Capitol rally said "Trust Women." I'm assuming this is a shorter version of the pro-choice slogan, "We trust the women of this nation to make their own morally correct choices."

I've been thinking about this more, and I've come upon a contradiction that seems irreconcilable on several levels.

(1) This slogan assumes that the choices involved have equal moral weight. Choosing adoption or choosing to raise the baby on one's own are indeed choices with equal moral weight, and pro-lifers do indeed "trust women" to make either of those choices and support either one wholeheartedly. However, the choice of abortion involves killing an innocent human being, which is an intrinsic moral evil. It does not carry the same moral weight as the other two choices, which are not intrinsic moral evils.

An analogous situation would be if the choice were between giving a newborn baby up for adoption or strangling him just after birth. Do PP advocates "trust women" to make either of those choices? That is, do they believe a woman should have the complete liberty to make either of those choices for themselves? (Sadly, in Canada, they do...)

(2) If we trust women to make their own morally correct choices in terms of abortion, then why do we NOT trust women to make their own morally correct choices when it comes to murder, theft, kidnapping, child abuse, prostitution, drug use, etc.?

What purpose do these laws serve if we can (apparently) trust women to make the morally correct choice 100% of the time? Given that women are regularly convicted of various crimes, that doesn't seem to be the case.

Moreover, abortion would be unheard of if we could "trust women" to act responsibly and not have sex (the act of which conception is a natural biological consequence) if they aren't prepared for the possibility of conception.* After all, shouldn't we "trust women" to know that all birth control has a failure rate?

(3) PP supporters oppose legislation that gives women the choice to view an ultrasound of their unborn child (such legislation was recently enacted in Texas, when an appeals court overturned an earlier injunction).

PP supporters trust women to make their own moral choice against abortion as long as women remain ignorant about accurate medical information regarding their child's level of development.

If this information is made available, however (or if pro-life sidewalk counselors are allowed to be seen or - O horrors! - heard), then suddenly women become feeble-minded fragile china dolls who must be saved from their own gullibility, for their own good.

So, "trust women" - but ONLY on the issue of abortion, and ONLY if they remain ignorant of medical facts regarding fetal development.

That doesn't seem like "trust" at all.

*Obviously, this applies to the 99% of women who conceive after consensual sex and not rape/incest situations.

7 Quick Takes Friday - January 20, 2012

2012-01-20T11:03:00.000-07:00

--- 1 ---

I didn't get to Quick Takes last week because I was busy preparing for Elanor's 7th birthday! We had a small celebration at home, with homemade pizza and birthday cake, and she was delighted to receive The Muppet Movie and Muppet Treasure Island on DVD (ever since we saw The Muppets, she's been in love with Kermit and the gang).

We spent the entire next day at our local zoo, along with her aunt, uncle, and cousin, and she had her cousin (also her best friend) spend the night as well.

I can't believe my eldest is 7 years old already! *sniff*

--- 2 ---

My maternity leave is almost up. I go back to work on Monday. *sigh* I don't want to leave my baby but I have no choice.

--- 3 ---

I didn't watch the debate the other night, but I did see the clip of Newt Gingrich skewering John King.

Now, I'm not a Newt fan; some of his political stances aside, the fact that he's a serial adulterer seriously puts me off. I get that he's allegedly had a genuine conversion of heart, but that doesn't mean I necessarily want to put him in an incredibly stressful job that isn't going to help his struggles against temptation. He's already admitted that the reasons he's cheated before were because he was working too hard and loved America too darn much. Well, Newt, that's exactly the position you'll be in as President, so....

However. This article made me realize something... it takes two to cheat. Remember, Marianne Gingrich cheated with Newt when he was a married man, so she's just as guilty of adultery. Maybe she didn't know he was married when their relationship started, but she should have broken it off the minute she found out (actually, she shouldn't be having sex outside of marriage at all, but I digress...), and she certainly shouldn't have been surprised when the adulterer she married cheated on her as well. Married men couldn't cheat if they didn't have someone willing to cheat with them. It takes two to tango.

But now ABC is asking us to take the word of an one adulterer over the other. Newt claims it's not true that he asked for an "open marriage," and it may not be. Or maybe it is. Regardless, this was back in 1999, and I can tell you that back in 1999 I was a Democrat who didn't favor making abortion illegal, had no problem with contraception, and supported homosexual "marriage." I'm not proud of the views I held then, and perhaps Newt isn't either.

Anyway. I still favor Santorum for the nomination, but Newt has risen slightly in my estimation based on his answer last night. Is it something that should be addressed at some point? Yes, especially in the context of Newt's support for the sanctity of marriage. But the first question of the debate, and using what's essentially a tabloid expose to do it? No. Inappropriate.

--- 4 ---

Here's another good political blog post worth reading. Caelum et Terra asks Obama supporters:

How would you have reacted in 2008 if any Republican ran promising to do the following?

(1) Codify indefinite detention into law;
(2) draw up a secret kill list of people, including American citizens, to assassinate without due process;
(3) proceed with warrantless spying on American citizens;
(4) prosecute Bush-era whistleblowers for violating state secrets;
(5) reinterpret the War Powers Resolution such that entering a war of choice without a Congressional declaration is permissible;
(6) enter and prosecute such a war;
(7) institutionalize naked scanners and intrusive full body pat-downs in major American airports;
(8) oversee a planned expansion of TSA so that its agents are already beginning to patrol American highways, train stations, and bus depots;
(9) wage an undeclared drone war on numerous Muslim countries that delegates to the CIA the final call about some strikes that put civilians in jeopardy;
(10) invoke the state-secrets privilege to dismiss lawsuits brought by civil-liberties organizations on dubious technicalities rather than litigating them on the merits;
(11) preside over federal raids on medical marijuana dispensaries;
(12) attempt to negotiate an extension of American troops in Iraq beyond 2011 (an effort that thankfully failed);
(13) reauthorize the Patriot Act;
(14) and select an economic team mostly made up of former and future financial executives from Wall Street firms that played major roles in the financial crisis.

--- 5 ---

Anyway. In non-politics-related news, my grandma Violet is coming for her annual visit! She'll arrive January 28 and leave March 8. Hooray!

--- 6 ---

The Phoenix March for Life is this weekend! Last year's was a lot of fun, so I'm really looking forward to it! Stay tuned for pictures and a report next week.

--- 7 ---

Also stay tuned for a new blog post on Sunday, as I'm participating in the 2nd Annual "Ask Them What They Mean By 'Choice'" blog event.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

How Bizarre

2012-01-19T08:35:00.001-07:00

Apparently, last June a Rick Santorum staffer sent a private e-mail from his personal e-mail account to a friend. The e-mail questioned if there was a Biblical basis for the stance that a woman should not be president. (Not a stance I share, personally.)

Now the left is claiming that since Santorum did not immediately and publicly denounce a private e-mail that wasn't even sent to him, and that there is no proof he ever saw, it means he shares and celebrates this staffer's opinion.

The hell? Are they holding Obama to the same standard of analyzing his employees' personal e-mails and publicly denouncing any personal viewpoints with which he disagrees?

My Encounter with Planned Parenthood Supporters - updated

2012-01-12T11:57:00.000-07:00

I updated My Encounter with Planned Parenthood Supporters to include a picture of the pro-life crowd taken at the very end of the rally (photo credit: AZ Right to Life). Aren't we a nice-looking bunch? :)

Gabe and I are in the front row, next to Kara and 3 of her girls!

My Encounter with Planned Parenthood Supporters

2012-01-09T15:39:00.005-07:00

Planned Parenthood of AZ held a "Stop the War Against Women" rally (*groan*) at the State Capitol today, so Arizona Right to Life asked for people to come and stage a counter-protest. I went, as did Kara, and here are my reflections on the event.

There were a lot more abortion supporters than pro-lifers there, but I think that's because PP had a lot more planning time (and they're also better funded -- I'm willing to be that a lot of the people there were employees). The vast majority of PP supporters seemed to be elderly women. There were some younger women, a few men, and a group of teens, but I'd estimate that 70-80% were retirees. Check out this article about the event, for example:

"Women's rights have been part of my life forever," said Donna Ellis, 69....

Malinda Briggs, 63, of Tucson, said...

Here are some pictures of the PP crowd:

(the signs read "No Laws on Our Bodies" and "Hands off My Womb"

In contrast, here's a group picture of some of the Arizona Right to Life crowed (this was at the very end of the rally so many people had already left):

Gabe and I are in the front row, next to Kara and her girls!

Pro-abortion supporters in person seem to be just as ignorant as pro-abortion supporters online. They kept chanting "Our bodies, our choice." When I would challenge this assumption with "It's a CHILD, not a choice," one response was, "No, it's an EMBRYO."

Last time I checked, an embryo was just the scientific term for a child in a certain stage of development, just like zygote, blastocyst, fetus, neonate, adolescent, etc.

I kept asking one lady why she thought that anyone had the right to kill an innocent human being, and all she would (could?) say in reply was, "It's a CHOICE. It's a CHOICE." She had the gall to say that we need "choice" in this country so we don't become like China and have forced abortions. When I told her that 60% of all abortions in this country were forced or coerced, she didn't believe me and demanded to know where my data was from. I told her to visit http://theunchoice.com, but I doubt she'll stop drinking the PP Kool-Aid long enough to do so.

When I asked why one human being has the right to kill another, or why human rights were bestowed based on location or stage of development, she refused to answer me. She just kept repeating, "It's a choice."

Of course, I also got the typical, "Abortion is a religious issue. There's separation of church and state" comment from one bitter old lady. (That was my impression of her - she was old, and her facial expression was very bitter.) This comment came despite the fact that I had not once brought up any argument pertaining to religion. I told her that abortion was a human rights issue, not a religious issue. I also told her about SecularProLife.org, the Atheist and Agnostic Pro-Life League, and Pro-Life Pagans. Her response? "Abortion is a religious issue. There's separation of church and state."

*sigh*

Another PP supporter had the gall to lecture me about bringing my infant son with me; she said all the shouting (by their side!) and the sun were bad for him. Seriously, lady? You're standing there advocating for the murder of unborn children and you're telling me how to parent? If I'd chosen to have an abortionist dismember him in the womb you wouldn't bat an eye, but now you think it's bad that I have him out in the sun, and around loud people?!

I guess they only care about children after they're born. (Hmmm, where have I heard that before...?)

I also had several of the PP supporters say things like, "I hope you support education reform and funding for women in crisis." Um, yeah, of course I do. Like I wrote yesterday, the myth that pro-lifers only care about unborn children can be easily refuted.

One guy kept repeating The Lord's Prayer over and over. I was tempted to ask him if he'd ever read the part of the Bible that said, "Thou shalt not murder."

Another PP supporter asked me if I was against death penalty. I said, "I am, but surely you can see the difference between a convicted felon and an innocent unborn child." Her response was, "They're not innocent."

Yes. That's what she said. They're not innocent. Apparently unborn children maliciously hijack a woman's uterus and there's nothing she can do about it. *facepalm* What, does she think they wear little T-shirts that say "Occupy Womb Street" while they're in there?

It was rather depressing to see so many misguided, deluded people, but it was encouraging to see that most of them were elderly women, as mentioned above. I'm sure AZRTL could have put together a larger protest if they'd had more time, but it was organized via Facebook with only a day or two of notice. I should've invited the PPers out to the Phoenix March for Life in two weeks!

Refuting a Common Myth

2012-01-08T20:49:00.001-07:00

This is a comment I recently left at the birth blog Stand and Deliver, which I'm posting here for easier reference. I find myself repeating this argument many times in various places across the blogopshere. What makes me sad is that this argument is so easy to refute, but pro-choicers don't seem interested in doing any research that might challenge their assumptions.

"The hypocrisy of many pro-life arguments, which glorify motherhood (by wishing all women to become mothers, however unwilling) yet do nothing to actually support mothers or babies, incenses me."

This is incorrect on two points: We on the pro-life side believe that women (and men) become parents the moment the child is conceived. However, we acknowledge that neither parent may be able or willing to parent the child after birth, in which case adoption is encouraged as an alternative to killing an innocent child who didn't ask to be conceived in less than ideal circumstances, or (in the case of rape/incest) executed for the crime of its biological parent.

As for the myth that pro-lifers do nothing to help those in crisis pregnancies, I beg you to do more research on this. See here for MANY examples.

Personally, in my city, I donate to the 1st Way CPC and am a big supporter of Maggie's Place, a home for mothers in crisis. When I lived in ND, I donated to St. Gianna's Maternity Home. Pro-lifers work their butts off to give women in crisis a viable alternative to killing their child, and it's disingenuous of you to suggest that they don't.

I believe that all human beings have a right to life from the moment of existence, and that neither the circumstances of their conception or their degree of "wantedness" by their biological parent(s) should affect that right to life. It's not a matter of "valuing the embryo more than the woman who carries it." It's about doing our utmost to respect the rights of BOTH human beings in a less-than-ideal situation. No human being deserves to die because s/he isn't wanted by the person who, 99% of the time, made the free, consensual choice to engage in the act that brought him/her into existence. It's a human rights issue, pure and simple, and I don't think the deliberate murder of an innocent human being should EVER be a legal, safe, accessible choice, because it's a grave moral evil and a human rights violation regardless of the circumstances involved.

That doesn't mean I don't support helping women in these situations in every way possible in the ways you describe -- but I think it's not an either/or situation, in that we EITHER oppose abortion OR we support helping women. In fact, it's both/and -- we BOTH oppose abortion AND support helping women. I've been involved in the pro-life movement for several years now, and I've never once met a single person who thought that a fetus should have more rights than the mother, or who opposed helping women in crisis pregnancies.

Something to add to your reading list, if you're truly interested in gaining a more balanced viewpoint on this topic - "The Hand of God" by the late Dr. Bernard Nathanson. He's the former head of NARAL, and also a former abortionist. His conversion story is chilling and moving, and he became pro-life purely based on the scientific, philosophical aspects of the argument, as well as the advent of ultrasound technology.

7 Quick Takes Friday - January 6, 2011 - Baptism Edition

2012-01-06T19:36:00.001-07:00

More pictures from Gabriel's baptism (there are more than seven, but who's counting?!)

Anointing his chest with oil

Carrying Gabriel around so everyone could put the sign of the cross on his forehead.


"Do you reject Satan, all his works, and all his empty promises?"

"This is our faith. This is the faith of the Church. We are proud to profess it, in Christ Jesus our Lord."

"I baptize you in the name of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit."

Godparents carrying the baptismal candle to us

Anointing his head with chrism oil - mmm, love that smell!

Introducing the newest member of the Catholic Church, Gabriel Keith Wahlund!

Deacon Luke, Gabriel, me, Collin

Our third (and, sadly, best) attempt at a family pic. Sigh.

Gabriel's godparents are our good friends Joe & Luisa. Joe is Deacon Luke's son!

The whole crew!

The new member of the Church, chillin' out in his sling. Being baptized is hard work!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

For Sale, Cheap -- Or Maybe Not

2012-01-03T16:44:00.001-07:00

The kids were watching The Small One today, and the following conversation ensued:

William: "Why does Small One have to be sold?"

Me: "Because he can't work enough to pay for his food anymore."

William: "Why can't he work?"

Me: "He's getting too old."

William: "Why is he getting old?"

Me: "All living things eventually get old ~~except for Dick Clark~~."

William: "I'm not old."

Me: "No, right now you're a little boy, but someday you'll get old ~~like Mommy~~."

*long pause*

William, with a slight hitch in his voice: "And then you'll have to sell me?"

(After working hard to smother laughter, I assured him that we weren't going to sell him, ever. ~~Violet, maybe, but not him.~~)

Baptism Day

2012-01-01T14:47:00.002-07:00

"This is our faith. This is the faith of the Church. We are proud to profess it, in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Gabriel Keith, child of God

7 Quick Takes - December 31, 2011 - Saturday edition

2011-12-31T17:00:00.001-07:00

--- 1 ---

Wow, my last Quick Takes of the year. We have no wild and crazy plans for NYE; Collin is doing overtime today (8am-5pm), so as soon as he's done we're going to head out to Golden Corral (my dad's request) for supper, come back home, put the kids to bed, and watch a movie. Or maybe play Apples to Apples. I picked up a bottle of Wilson Creek Peach Bellini sparkling wine with which to toast the New Year (assuming I make it to midnight!).

--- 2 ---

Gabriel is doing great - he is 9lbs and still growing! - although we had a scare with possible pneumonia this week. He had his first chest x-ray, poor kid, and his first breathing treatment. We had a couple of rough nights Thankfully he's doing much better and there's no sign of pneumonia.

He is being baptized tomorrow after the 11am Mass! Hooray! I'll try to update with pics ASAP.

--- 3 ---

Christmas was lovely, although my house looks like a toy store exploded. The kids got spoiled rotten. Elanor got her long-awaited My Little Ponies, William got his much-longed-for lightsaber, and Violet got a Pillow Pet and THREE different baby dolls. Plus more toys and books and clothes. Gabriel received some nice things, too, mostly clothes. They are happy children.

--- 4 ---

I used Jennifer Fulwiler's Saint Generator to pick a patron saint for 2012, and it picked St. Anastasia. Her feast day is December 25 (!) and her intercessions are credited with the protection of the faithful from poison and other harmful substances (uh oh). I also read that she's the patroness of martyrs and widows... and I'm hoping I become neither in 2012 (gulp).

--- 5 ---

My dad has been here since Christmas Eve, and it's been so wonderful having him here, especially since Collin has been working tons of overtime this week and I've been sick with a cold. He leaves Tuesday and I'll be sad to see him go. :( But my grandmother plans to come out in the next month or two, and my mother, stepfather, and aunt are planning a visit in March, so I'm looking forward to having more family visit.

--- 6 ---

Obviously, my biggest achievement in 2011 was my sweet baby Gabriel. :) However, one of my other noteworthy accomplishments was my first paid freelance writing job! I wrote an article about Mary, "Humble Handmaid and "Mother of God"? What Catholics Believe about Mary" for Crosswalk.com.

--- 7 ---

Have a happy and blessed New Year!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Logic: You're doing it wrong

2011-12-26T13:36:00.003-07:00

Netflix has been my friend this maternity leave, and I'm catching up on one of my favorite shows, Law and Order: SVU.

Love the show. Dislike the boneheaded logic spouted in some episodes, such as "Mask" (Season 12, episode 13). Here's a choice quote:

"The Catholic Church considers IVF to be a sin. I called the Pope and invited him to come and meet some of our babies. So far, no response." - doctor at a "reproductive services" clinic that does IVF and experiments on embryos

Her logic, simplified:

Babies are good. IVF produces babies. Therefore, IVF is good.
Let's apply that logic elsewhere:

Babies are good. Acts of rape sometimes produce babies. Therefore, rape is good.

Huh? You mean that doesn't work? Rape is still bad and immoral even though the children who are the result of acts of rape are not?

Exactly.

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-25T14:40:00.001-07:00

A Christmas Carol
by G.K.Chesterton

The Christ-child lay on Mary's lap,
His hair was like a light.
(O weary, weary were the world,
But here is all aright.)

The Christ-child lay on Mary's breast
His hair was like a star.
(O stern and cunning are the kings,
But here the true hearts are.)

The Christ-child lay on Mary's heart,
His hair was like a fire.
(O weary, weary is the world,
But here the world's desire.)

The Christ-child stood on Mary's knee,
His hair was like a crown,
And all the flowers looked up at Him,
And all the stars looked down

'A Christmas Carol' poem

I

The shepherds went their hasty way,
And found the lowly stable-shed
Where the Virgin-Mother lay:
And now they checked their eager tread,
For to the Babe, that at her bosom clung,
A Mother's song the Virgin-Mother sung.

II

They told her how a glorious light,
Streaming from a heavenly throng.
Around them shone, suspending night!
While sweeter than a mother's song,
Blest Angels heralded the Savior's birth,
Glory to God on high! and Peace on Earth.

III

She listened to the tale divine,
And closer still the Babe she pressed:
And while she cried, the Babe is mine!
The milk rushed faster to her breast:
Joy rose within her, like a summer's morn;
Peace, Peace on Earth! the Prince of Peace is born.

IV

Thou Mother of the Prince of Peace,
Poor, simple, and of low estate!
That strife should vanish, battle cease,
O why should this thy soul elate?
Sweet Music's loudest note, the Poet's story,
Didst thou ne'er love to hear of fame and glory?

V

And is not War a youthful king,
A stately Hero clad in mail?
Beneath his footsteps laurels spring;
Him Earth's majestic monarchs hail
Their friends, their playmate! and his bold bright eye
Compels the maiden's love-confessing sigh.

VI

Tell this in some more courtly scene,
To maids and youths in robes of state!
I am a woman poor and mean,
And wherefore is my soul elate.
War is a ruffian, all with guilt defiled,
That from the aged father's tears his child!

VII

A murderous fiend, by fiends adored,
He kills the sire and starves the son;
The husband kills, and from her board
Steals all his widow's toil had won;
Plunders God's world of beauty; rends away
All safety from the night, all comfort from the day.

VIII

Then wisely is my soul elate,
That strife should vanish, battle cease:
I'm poor and of low estate,
The Mother of the Prince of Peace.
Joy rises in me, like a summer's morn:
Peace, Peace on Earth! The Prince of Peace is born!

Possessive last names make the Baby Jesus cry

2011-12-14T21:41:00.003-07:00

A Christmas card PSA from your friendly neighborhood grammar/punctuation freak:

When signing your Christmas card/letter (or return address labels), do not sign them like so:

Merry Christmas from the Wahlund's!

If your intention is to send Christmas greetings on behalf of your entire family, then you want your last name to be plural, not possessive. For example:

Merry Christmas from the Wahlunds! means there is more than one Wahlund wishing you a Merry Christmas.

The possessive form, on the other hand, indicates that something belonging to the Wahlund family is wishing you a Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas from the Wahlund's... what? The Wahlund's cat? The Wahlund's dog? The Wahlund's thermonuclear bomb facility?

If your last name ends with an 's' or 'z', then your best bet is to use a workaround such as, "Merry Christmas from the Glass family!" Or you could add an -es. But for the love of all that is holy and innocent, do not use an apostrophe to create a plural form of a surname. Please.

Baby Jesus will thank you.

Sincerely,

Someone who has seen this on her received Christmas cards entirely too often this month.

Lazy 7 Quick Takes - December 9, 2011

2011-12-09T15:21:00.002-07:00

Gabriel's birth story - November 2011

2011-12-05T15:10:00.002-07:00

The birth story of Gabriel Keith
11/26/11 (37w1d), 6:09am MST
Weight: 7lbs, 9oz; Length: 18.5 in.

I discovered a surefire way to induce labor - just cook a Thanksgiving dinner for nine people and poof! You'll go into labor the next day. At least, that's what worked for me...

I spent most of Thanksgiving (36w6d pregnant) on my feet, roasting a turkey for the first time, concocting homemade stuffing, and making various side dishes. I did try to get off my feet whenever possible, but it was still an extremely busy day. I was wiped out by 6pm and in bed and asleep by 8pm.

The next morning, I woke up at 4:45am and couldn't get back to sleep. I decided to go downstairs and surf the Internet for a while. I ended up finding a fantastic Black Friday deal on a new pre-lit Christmas tree at Joann.com ($130 tree for $40, plus free shipping) so I (foolishly) went upstairs to wake up Collin and ask if we could buy it. He did not take kindly to being woken up that early on one of his rare days off (can't say I blame him) but eventually he gave me the green light to buy the tree. I did, went back to bed, and managed to fall back asleep until 8am.

When I got up again and used the bathroom, I noticed a bit of blood in the toilet and on the toilet paper. Hmmm, odd, I thought, but passed it off as spotting due to my overexertion the previous day. After all, I was only full-term that very day, and my last pregnancy had gone to 40w3d, so I doubted it meant anything.

I told Collin abut it, though, and we decided that I should pack my hospital bag just in case (something that was on my to-do list for the weekend, anyhow). I packed as best I could and threw some stuff into the washing machine to pack later (such as all my newborn-sized baby outfits, none of which I'd washed yet).

Collin wanted to see the chiropractor, as he'd been having back pain the last week, so we loaded everyone in the car. The kids and I did a bit of grocery shopping while Collin visited the chiropractor. When he was done, we went to see The Muppets (fantastic movie), and then went home.

I used the bathroom again when we got home, and -- surprise -- lost my entire mucous plug in one fell swoop. That had never happened to me before so it was rather jarring. It made me think that maybe something was happening, after all. Still, I'd heard that it was possible to lose your mucous plug and not go into labor for days or even weeks, or that the mucous plug could regenerate, so I still tried to convince myself that it didn't mean anything. Even so, I finished my laundry and made sure my hospital bag was packed and ready to go.

I started timing contractions around 5pm. They were painless, but coming in fairly regular intervals about 10-20 minutes apart. I took a warm bath with Epsom salts, a trick that had always worked to calm BH contractions before. This time, they kept coming. We all piled onto our king-size bed and watched TV for a while, and by 9pm the contractions were starting to become a bit uncomfortable. Collin noticed that I was pacing around and decided to put the kids to bed ASAP. After they were settled, he called his sister-in-law to let her know we might need her to watch the kids. (She was actually our back-up plan for childcare - our initial plan had been to have his dad come over, but his dad was currently en route from North Dakota and was scheduled to arrive in AZ sometime late Saturday or early Sunday!)

Around 10:30pm or so I called my doula, Brealin, to tell her that my contractions were about 7-8 minutes apart, and I wasn't sure if we should go to the hospital or not. I was skittish because of my precipitous labor with Violet, which had only lasted 2.5 hours start to finish. Brealin encouraged me to wait for an hour and see how I felt first, and to eat something nutritious and rich in protein to keep up my energy in case this was real labor. I ate some Thanksgiving leftovers (turkey, sweet potatoes, and a roll) and drank water, all while timing contractions.

Finally, around 11:30pm, I decided I wanted to go to the hospital. The contractions weren't lasting very long but they were coming closer together, and I at least wanted to get checked out to see if anything was happening. I was open to coming back home if necessary, but I didn't want to have too close a call as I'd had with Violet. I called Brealin and arranged to meet her at the hospital, and as soon as my SIL arrived we headed to L&D.

[Collin asked me to write about how he single-handedly defeated a horde of Viking warriors that were between us and the hospital, so I'm humoring him.]

Once I got settled into triage, a check revealed that I was 4cm and 60% effaced, but baby was still high up (-3 station). The triage nurse encouraged me to walk the halls for an hour or two and then come back to get checked; if there was progress I'd be admitted, but if not I'd be sent home. In retrospect I probably should have labored at home a while longer, but like I said Violet's fast birth had made me skittish. With her birth I had labored at home too long and had just barely made it to the hospital in time.

Brealin, Collin, and I walked the halls from 12:30am-2:30am. Thankfully the place was deserted since it was the middle of the night, so we were able to wander around the public areas -- the lobby, the chapel, etc. When a contraction hit I'd stop where I was and "slow dance" with Collin, laying my head on his chest and swaying my hips as he and Brealin rubbed my back or stroked my hair. It was wonderfully soothing.

Around 2:30am we went back up to L&D triage, and the nurse checked me again. I was 5cm and 100% effaced! I can't remember for sure if baby had come down at all -- I think he might have been at -1 station -- but they were going to admit me. I was elated that I was going to meet my baby that day, and that I'd finally have a chance to labor in a jacuzzi tub!

The triage nurse told me that my OB, Dr. N (the one I'd seen throughout my pregnancy) was scheduled to be on call at 7am, but the doctor currently on call (Dr. M) was one I'd never met. I told her there was no way I was going to wait 'til 7am to have this baby so I'd take my chances with Dr. M!

Luckily, the nurses had gotten my GBS test result, which was negative (I'd had the test at my November 17 appointment but hadn't gotten the result yet) so I didn't need an IV. I consented to a heplock, stayed on a monitoring strip for 20 minutes while Brealin fired up the tub, and finally was given the green light to get in around 3:00am or so.

Collin actually took a short video to commemorate the event:

HEAVEN, I tell you. HEAVEN. Brealin laid out a bunch of little battery-operated tea lights, then shut off the overhead lights. She also laid gauze pads with drops of of clary sage essential oil
around the tub. Oh, it was amazing. I sat and soaked, my head pillowed by a fluffy towel, and let the jets pound my back whenever I had a contraction. I felt like I was in my own little exclusive birth spa. The white noise of the jets was almost hypnotic, and I kind of felt like I was in a trance. The contractions didn't even hurt - I felt pressure but no pain. I'd rest my head against Collin's hand whenever I had a contraction, but otherwise I didn't move other than to sip water, and once to suck on a honey stick provided by Brealin.

Our L&D nurse, Amy, was absolutely FABULOUS. She left us completely alone and trusted my doula to come get her if necessary. She came in every 30 minutes to check the baby's heartbeat via Doppler, and I didn't even have to get out of the tub. She read my birth plan and respected it 110% - I couldn't have asked for a better nurse.

Around 5am I started feeling "pushy," and also started feeling a little panicky - the "I don't think I can do this much longer" feelings that usually indicate transition. I got out of the tub (boo) for a cervical check. When Amy told me I was only 7cm, I was devastated and started to cry. I thought for sure I'd be fully dilated.

Amy quietly recommended sitting on the birth ball to encourage baby to drop down further to promote dilation, so they brought one in and I spent the next half hour or so sitting on that. At this point my former peace had been shattered -- I was chilly from leaving the warm environment of the tub and the contractions hurt like hell now that I was out of the water and sitting upright. After a certain point I couldn't stand sitting anymore and started pacing the room, stopping to brace myself at the end of the bed with each contractions. I swayed my hips like I was doing the hula, and made low mooing sounds (that's what they sounded like to me, anyway) in my throat.

The running commentary in my head was, I hate this. I want an epidural. I want a C-section. I don't care how, I just want this baby OUT because I can't do this anymore. However, I didn't vocalize my thoughts because I knew it'd be useless, and some part of my brain knew that I really didn't want drugs, no matter how appealing they seemed at the moment.

Brealin, Collin, and Amy were all doing their best to encourage me, but I felt like labor would never end. I was accustomed to speedy transition (with William, I went from 7cm to 10cm in 15 minutes; with Violet, I arrived at the hospital 10cm and ready to push), and this time transition was taking forever, like it had with Elanor's labor (I'd also had the urge to push at 7cm with her). I was scared that it'd take over an hour to push this baby out, as it had with my first labor.

Around 5:50am I said that I felt immense pressure and really had to push. I was checked again - 9cm.

Amy explained that the bag of waters was literally bulging out of my cervix, and the minute it broke the baby would be here, but in the meantime I had to get to 10cm. I was not a happy camper. I stood at the edge of the bed and worked through contractions as best I could, with Collin and Brealin doing their best to give words of cheer and encouragement, and me fantasizing all the ways they could die. (Okay, maybe I wasn't that bad, but I was in a lot of pain.)

Brealin repeated again that once the bag of waters broke, the baby would be here. I growled in a voice reminiscent of Linda Blair in The Exorcist, "Then let's break the goddamn thing!" Brealin quickly agreed and Amy went to ask someone to find the doctor to come in and break my water.

At this point, things get a little fuzzy for me. I had a contraction that felt like it was ripping me in two, and my body started to push all on its own. The feeling was so consuming that I couldn't vocalize what was happening other than to groan. I was still standing at the foot of the bed, with my hands braced on its sides, when I heard a *plop* and felt something literally drop out of my vagina.

I gasped, "Oh my God!" and reached down to feel a bulging, squishy bag hanging between my legs - it felt like a water balloon. I thought it was the baby's head, but it was only the amniotic fluid sac - baby was coming out in the caul. That same second, things went nuts. Amy, Brealin, and Collin were the only ones in the room. Amy shouted at Collin to go get the doctor and more nurses to help. Brealin was telling me that I had to get on the bed, but I shook my head and said, "No, I can't!" - fully intending to push the baby out right then and there, standing by the end of the bed. (Probably not the best choice given that I was standing on a hard wooden floor, but I wasn't thinking too clearly at the moment.)

I have always said that I have membranes of steel, as my water has never broken prior to pushing (and twice it's been broken by the nurse or midwife as baby was crowning), and this birth just reinforced that notion given how long the sac stayed intact.

Amy and Brealin both told me that I had to get on the bed. They gently, but firmly, lifted me on to it, with Amy supporting the sac that was still hanging out of me as I awkwardly climbed in. I crawled on the bed on my hands and knees and stayed that way. I was not moving, and to their credit I don't think anyone asked me to move.

All I have to go on now is what I could hear, because I was clinging to the bed for dear life, on my hands and knees with my butt in the air and couldn't see much of what was going on. I do remember someone - maybe Amy? - telling me not to push yet. I was trying not to but my body wasn't cooperating; with every contraction I could feel myself push but there wasn't anything I could do to stop it.

Brealin told me that Dr. M moseyed on into the room -- apparently, the urgency of what was going on had not been thoroughly communicated to him. I imagine that the sight he met when he walked in the door -- me, on the bed, butt-first and an amniotic fluid sac hanging out, huffing through a contraction, as the nurse supported the sac in her hand, and other nurses scurrying around getting the baby warmer ready -- made him realize that we didn't have any time to lose. He ran to the sink, scrubbed up, and dashed to the bed. God bless the man, he didn't bat an eye at the fact that I was on my hands and knees, as some OBs might.

Now everyone was telling me to push. I was in too much pain to communicate the fact that I didn't have any control over it anymore -- my body was pushing all by itself regardless of what anyone wanted me to do! I made an effort to push harder, more because I wanted to pain to freaking END already.

The baby's head came out in the caul, and as the shoulders were being born, the amniotic fluid sac "exploded like a bomb" (quoth my husband). The nurses had prepared for this by putting towels on the bed and floor, but I don't know how wet they (they nurses) got. Once the shoulders were out, the rest of the baby was born quickly, and I heaved a huge sigh of relief.

Since he couldn't put the baby on my chest as I'd requested in my birth plan, the doctor instead handed the baby to Collin, who looked between the baby's legs and gasped, "It's a boy!" We hadn't found out the baby's sex beforehand but I'd had incredibly strong boy vibes throughout my pregnancy. Still, it was jarring to realize that my vibes had been correct and we indeed had a new son! I said something like, "Oh God, it's a boy, I'm so happy! I really wanted a boy!" and was half-sobbing with joy. (Collin said he was pretty teary-eyed too.)

The doctor asked a nurse for the time of birth, and she said 6:09am. Collin remembers seeing that the sky was lightening outside, and later I looked up the time of sunrise - it rose exactly one hour after he was born, at 7:09am.

Meanwhile, it was very awkward, clinging to the bed with my butt still in the air, not knowing quite what to do now that he was born. I heard the doctor asking about cutting the cord, because our birth plan specified that we wanted the cord to stop pulsing first. However, it was a little complicated given that I was on my hands and knees and couldn't really hold the baby skin-to-skin in that position, but it was equally as awkward trying to flip over while the umbilical cord was still intact and the bed below me was soaked with fluid and blood. Eventually I just told them to go ahead and cut the cord to make things easier.

Once they did so, the nurses removed what dirty linens they could and put clean blankets and towels underneath me, and helped me turn over. While my butt was still in the air, I heard a nurse say, "He's 7lbs, 9oz!" I couldn't believe how big he was for 3 weeks early; Elanor had been born at 39 weeks and she'd been only 1oz heavier at 7lbs, 10oz.

As soon as I had turned over, I saw an unfamiliar man watching me with a smile on his face. "Oh, hi," I said. "You must be Dr. M."

"Yes, that's me," he said.

"Nice to meet you face-to-face instead of butt-to-face," I quipped.

He just grinned wider and shook my hand. "Congratulations."

Then, FINALLY, they handed me my sweet baby, and I marveled over his full head of hair and his adorable little scrunchy face. I kissed his cheeks, raved over his cuteness, and told everyone his name was Gabriel Keith. I tried to breastfeed him in order to aid the expulsion of the placenta, but he wasn't very interested in latching on right away; he just laid on my chest, blinking his eyes, and watching my face.

Collin took a video of us about 10 minutes after Gabriel was born, while we were doing some skin-to-skin snuggling. Please ignore how drugged out I look; I promise it's due to exhaustion (and baby bliss), not medication!

Dr. M was incredibly patient. He just sat and waited for a good 15-20 minutes, as the nurses did all the newborn procedures on Gabriel (he was on my chest the whole time). Finally, he spoke up and said he was concerned about the amount of bleeding I was having, and he thought it best if we tried some fundal massage to get the placenta expelled. He also asked if I'd consent to an IV bag of pitocin, due to the amount of bleeding I was having. I consented to both, and was very pleased that he'd asked my permission first.

He came over to the bed and did the fundal massage, which worked almost immediately to get the placenta out. The nurse hooked up the pitocin to my heplock, and then I gave Gabriel back to Collin so Dr. M could check for tearing. Not surprisingly, I had a 2nd degree tear (the only birth I haven't torn was with William). I had to wiggle my way toward the end of the bed and put my feet up in stirrups so he could stitch me up. Even though I got a shot of local anesthetic, the stitching hurt more than I remembered from previous births, and it seemed to take an inordinately long time. I think part of that was the fact that I was absolutely exhausted, so the experience seemed to last longer than it really did.

Finally, he was done and I got my baby back. :) Soon after I got a lovely dose of ibuprofen, a wonderful ice pack for my nether regions, and I got Gabriel to latch on. He nursed like a champ from the get-go. I went on Facebook to spread the news, ate a ham-and-cheese omelet that tasted fantastic (I hadn't realized just how hungry I was until I ordered breakfast!), and a few hours later we were moved up to our postpartum recovery room and starting calling family and friends to spread the joyful news that unto us a child was born.

Before we were transferred to the postpartum unit, Amy thanked us for the privilege of witnessing our birth, as this was her last shift; she was transferring to another hospital in the Valley to work as a lactation consultant, and she was glad to end her career in L&D on such a high note. That made me a little teary-eyed. She was a fantastic L&D nurse so it's definitely the hospital's loss!

Also, the pediatric nurse said, "I've never seen anyone deliver on their hands and knees before. That was cool to watch." I later learned that the L&D nurses on the floor that day had nicknamed me "Rockstar Mom" due to the hands-and-knees birth. I didn't think it was all that impressive at the time, given that I was the one with my butt in the air, but hindsight is 20/20 (ba dum bum ching!).

We saw Dr. N as we were leaving the L&D ward, and he came over to congratulate us and said he was disappointed he'd missed the birth, but was glad things had gone so well for me. He said something along the lines of, "I heard you did great," so evidently my reputation of Rockstar Mom was already making the rounds.

The story behind Gabriel's name: Gabriel Keith was the boy name we'd had picked out for Violet, had she'd been a boy, so it's one we'd been waiting to use for a while. Gabriel is Collin's confirmation name, and as an added bonus this baby was conceived on the Feast of the Annunciation, making it very appropriate. Plus, the name goes with the "Holy Family" theme we have going with our kids' names (their middle names are Mary, Joseph, and Elizabeth). Keith is my father-in-law's name, and we wanted to honor him as well. We also liked the initials G.K., in honor of G.K. Chesterton, one of my very favorite authors (Collin and I were confirmed into Catholicism on his birthday!).

Gabriel is such a sweet baby, so mellow and content. His two sisters and his brother absolutely adore him. We are blessed!

For unto us a child was born

2011-11-26T07:56:00.001-07:00

It's a boy! Gabriel Keith was born at 6:09am AZ time (37w1d), 7lbs 9oz, 18.5 in long.

7 Quick Takes Friday - November 25, 2011

2011-11-25T18:54:00.000-07:00

--- 1 ---

We had a lovely Thanksgiving. I roasted a turkey for the very first time, and it turned out well. I also made homemade stuffing, sweet potato casserole, green beans, homemade rolls, and mulled wine. Collin's grandparents, sister-in-law, and niece came over, and after stuffing ourselves we lit the firepit and stayed outside visiting while the kids played. (Thank goodness I had help with the clean-up, because I was wiped out! I went to bed around 8pm.)

--- 2 ---

I do not, as a rule, participate in the Black Friday madness. No money savings is worth being trampled. I woke up at 5am this morning and couldn't sleep, though, so I started aimlessly surfing the Internet and stumbled across a 7-ft. pre-lit Christmas tree at Joann.com for $39.99 (originally $129.99)! As the top tier of our current (secondhand) Christmas tree didn't work last year, this sale was appealing, so I went so far as to wake up Collin to ask his opinion. He was grumpy but after a long discussion he gave me the the green light to buy it, and I did! I even had a coupon for free shipping. Yay for a working Christmas tree!

--- 3 ---

I also dropped by Half-Price books the other day and got some great bargains:

A dozen Star Trek: Voyager books for $5!

A hardcover box set of the Lord of the Rings trilogy for $30!

--- 4 ---

Wednesday's drive home was my last time commuting until my maternity leave is over (probably sometime in February-ish). Hooray! That drive was getting tough.

--- 5 ---

As has become our Black Friday tradition, we went to see a movie this afternoon (we saw Tangled last year), and it was fantastic:

The kids loved it too! Violet was dancing along with the opening number; it was so adorable.

--- 6 ---

In pregnancy news, I'm full-term today. As much as I'd hoped for a December baby, s/he may come sooner than anticipated. I think I lost some of my mucous plug this morning, and I've started timing contractions just in case. It could be prodromal labor (I had a ton of it with Violet), but we'll have to see what happens. I'm going to take a warm bath with Epsom salts shortly and see if that makes the contractions fizzle. On the up side, at least it's kicked my butt into getting my hospital bag packed and all my newborn-sized baby clothes washed.

--- 7 ---

Ready for the first Sunday of Advent and the new Roman Missal? I am! I downloaded the "iMassExplained" iPhone app from the Daughters of St. Paul and I'm looking forward to using the new translation for the first time this weekend.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

7 Quick Takes Friday - November 18, 2011

2011-11-18T10:11:00.000-07:00

--- 1 ---

36 weeks today! We're heading into the home stretch. I had an appointment yesterday; everything looks great. I had the GBS test and the NP attempted to check my cervix, but it was so high up that she decided not to try. So, seems as though Baby is content to stay where s/he is for now. :)

--- 2 ---

I went to a blogger meet-up last weekend!

From L to R: Me, Alison, Danya, and Leila. We had lunch at the Arcadia Cafe (yum!) and gabbed for hours. So rejuvenating! HUGE thanks to Kara who watched Violet for me (Collin was overloaded with homework and needed a toddler-free day) so I could go.

--- 3 ---

I start working from home November 28, thank goodness. I got everything squared away with paperwork and etc. this week. The commute is really getting difficult.

--- 4 ---

We are hosting Thanksgiving at our house this year! Eep! Have I mentioned I've never roasted a turkey before? I'm thinking of using this recipe, but I'm not sure. Is it important to have stuffing actually in the turkey, or is it okay to make separately? Is it redundant to have mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes? (I love 'em both!) We're going to do our ingredient shopping this weekend so I have to get this figured out...

--- 5 ---

I've done a bit of Christmas shopping already but there's still more to do... I did pick up a Christmas present for Señor/ita Cuatro yesterday, however:

I love the little reindeer on the feet!

--- 6 ---

Collin has Wednesday through Monday off of work!!!! (Well, technically, he's working for a few hours over the holiday weekend, but no more than 2 per day.) It'll be nice to have him around to run kid interference while I'm in full-bore "decorate for Christmas and get everything washed/ready for baby" mode.

--- 7 ---

Encyclical on the Feast of Christ the King, His Holiness Pope Pius XI, December 11, 1925

The faithful, moreover, by meditating upon these truths, will gain much strength and courage, enabling them to form their lives after the true Christian ideal. If to Christ our Lord is given all power in heaven and on earth; if all men, purchased by his precious blood, are by a new right subjected to his dominion; if this power embraces all men, it must be clear that not one of our faculties is exempt from his empire. He must reign in our minds, which should assent with perfect submission and firm belief to revealed truths and to the doctrines of Christ. He must reign in our wills, which should obey the laws and precepts of God. He must reign in our hearts, which should spurn natural desires and love God above all things, and cleave to him alone. He must reign in our bodies and in our members, which should serve as instruments for the interior sanctification of our souls, or to use the words of the Apostle Paul, as instruments of justice unto God.[35] If all these truths are presented to the faithful for their consideration, they will prove a powerful incentive to perfection. It is Our fervent desire, Venerable Brethren, that those who are without the fold may seek after and accept the sweet yoke of Christ, and that we, who by the mercy of God are of the household of the faith, may bear that yoke, not as a burden but with joy, with love, with devotion; that having lived our lives in accordance with the laws of God's kingdom, we may receive full measure of good fruit, and counted by Christ good and faithful servants, we may be rendered partakers of eternal bliss and glory with him in his heavenly kingdom.

Have a blessed Christ the King Sunday!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Broken Fortress giveaway week!

2011-11-14T09:19:00.001-07:00

Edit 11/16/11 - check out today's giveaway featuring a gift certificate to Hand Knit by Cara. I am in love with this Christmas stocking!

The very talented Allison over at A Broken Fortress is hosting a Holiday Giveaway week! Today's giveaway features items from her wonderful Etsy shop Lila's Locker. Check it out!

7 Quick Takes Friday - November 11, 2011

2011-11-11T08:45:00.001-07:00

--- 1 ---

Thank you to our Veterans! I'm very proud of the two servicemen in my family.This (middle) is my cousin, Sgt. Adam Walsvik, who serves with the 188th Engineer Company in the North Dakota National Guard. He's currently serving in Afghanistan. Here's an article about an award that Adam won last year. (Incidentally, I had no idea my cousin knew General Hammond. LOL!)

This is my uncle, Command Sgt. Maj. Joel Walsvik (he is also Adam's uncle). I am his namesake (I was named after him and my great-grandmother Anna). He's also with the North Dakota National Guard, and has served several tours of duty in Iraq and one in Kosovo.

Here's an article about some awards he recently bestowed to fellow ND National Guard soldiers.

--- 2 ---

Speaking of the North Dakota National Guard, I read this blurb at the bottom of one of the above articles:Since the 2001 terrorist attacks on America, the North Dakota National Guard has mobilized more than 3,500 Soldiers and more than 1,800 Airmen in support of the Global War on Terrorism. Currently, about a dozen North Dakota Guardsmen are serving overseas while more than 4,000 remain in the state for emergency response and national defense. For every 10,000 citizens in North Dakota, 65 serve in the North Dakota National Guard, a rate that’s more than four times the national average.Wow!So proud and thankful for our troops, no matter where they are. Here is a great prayer for veterans that I read today.

--- 3 ---

Anyway, back to more mundane topics.I try to restrain myself from being snarky to total strangers on Facebook, I really do, but there are some occasions where I just can't resist. Case in point, from Kohl's FB wall:

--- 4 ---

Elanor's first T-ball game went really well! I'm so proud of her.

--- 5 ---

I met Kara in person on Saturday, at her sweet girl Tessa's 2nd birthday party! We were both so busy running after kids that we forgot to take a picture together, but she got a great one of our oldest daughters together:

(My daughter Elanor is on the left; Kara's daughter Amelia is on the right.) They became fast friends!

--- 6 ---

Violet particularly enjoyed the cupcakes at the party:

--- 7 ---

By the way, did anyone else know that Google released an official Blogger iPhone app back in September? It makes posting on the go a lot easier, especially when it comes to uploading pictures! That'll come in handy for updating my blog after Senor/ita Cuatro arrives. Plus, it's free.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

My three blondies

2011-11-05T17:49:00.001-07:00

7 Quick Takes Friday - November 4, 2011

2011-11-04T09:20:00.002-07:00

1. I turned 31 yesterday! Other than that, it was an average day. I went to work, got off at 1pm, prayed at the abortion clinic for an hour, did some browsing at the St. Vincent de Paul store (I found a Spiderman coat in William's size for $1.29! Woohoo!), drove home, picked up the kids, took them to Elly's T-ball practice, and then went home. (Whew!)

2. However, I took today off of work, and Collin already has the day off. We went to my OB appointment together, then out for brunch, and we're going to go see Courageous.

3. My OB appt went well. Baby's still head down and has a heart rate of 140. I mentioned the near-constant back pain, and Dr. N recommended a chiropractor he knows who works with a lot of pregnant women, so I might try that. He also recommended a support belt.

4. When I was at the St. Vincent de Paul store yesterday, I handed my debit card and ID to the cashier. He looked at my ID, looked at me, looked at my ID, looked at me. I thought he was going to make a birthday comment, but he said, "You're even more beautiful in person." It was a sweet compliment and made my day!

5. Elanor has her first T-ball game tomorrow morning! She has a uniform and everything. I had thought they were just getting T-shirts, but no - she has gray pants, a blue shirt, blue socks and a hat. I'll be sure to take pictures. Her team is the "Kansas City Royals." (All the teams are named after professional baseball teams, and the real Royals train in Surprise.)

6. I'm terribly excited for tomorrow night - the Knights of Columbus are hosting a "Wives Appreciation Dinner," and Collin and I are going! By ourselves! To a fancy restaurant! With other adults! (My BIL and SIL are watching the kids.) I might even wear make-up, which is usually a once-per-year event.

7. On Sunday the kids and I are going to meet Kara at her sweet daughter's birthday party! I can't wait!

7a. I had hoped Collin could come with us to the birthday party, but his stupid employer has required mandatory overtime on Saturday AND Sunday. Boo, hiss. I think I just need to resign myself to the fact that he will have mandatory overtime for the rest of our natural lives, because there's no end in sight. At least when I have the baby he can take a week or two of FMLA leave and get a small reprieve - even his slave drivers at work can't deny him that without violating federal law.

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7 Quick Takes Friday - October 28, 2011

2011-10-28T08:44:00.001-07:00

--- 1 ---

Elanor had her first T-ball practice yesterday. It went surprisingly well. I was a little apprehensive beforehand because she's never participated in any kind of organized sport before, but she was excited, enthusiastic and did a really good job of following the coach's directions. I was also afraid that she'd inherited her parents' complete lack of anything resembling athletic ability, but she managed to hit and catch decently enough for a 6-year-old. Maybe the complete lack of coordination has skipped a generation. :P

--- 2 ---

Remember how I said last week that I wanted to get her a pink glove? Well, call me Mother of the Year, because it suddenly occurred to me on Tuesday that my daughter, like her mother, is left-handed, and thus she needs a glove to wear on her right hand. Of course, there is not a single place in Phoenix (that I could find) that carried a right-handed pink T-ball glove. I would have ordered the dang thing online weeks ago had I remembered that she was left-handed. I ended up having to get her a boring black-and-white one instead (it was the only one at the sports store I went to that was right-handed, in her size, and didn't cost an arm and a leg). In retrospect I guess it's good to have baseball gloves that are gender-neutral, in the event that Violet and Baby W. ever reuse them. Still... she would have been so cute. Oh well.

--- 3 ---

Happily, I ended up only having to buy one Halloween costume this year (William's Spiderman outfit) as Elanor decided to be Princess Tiana again - thankfully her costume from last year still fits. Our plan is for me and Violet to stay home and hand out candy while Collin takes the older two trick-or-treating. If Collin gets a call at 6:29pm from a long-winded, whiny customer who won't shut up, I swear I'm going to reach through the phone lines and slap him or her. I hate the nights when he gets a call a few minutes before his shift ends and ends up having to take an hour or more to deal with it.

--- 4 ---

William asked me what I was going to be for Halloween, and I replied, "I'm going to be a pregnant mommy." He considered this, shook his head, and declared, "No, you need to be a princess, because you're my princess." He even found me a princess crown to wear from Elanor's dress-up stash. So, I guess I'll be a pregnant princess.

--- 5 ---

I suppose it beats the other costume I had in mind:

It's quite the resemblance right now.

--- 6 ---

Forty-nine days until my due date. As cool as it would be to have a December 17 baby (it's the 11th anniversary of our engagement as well as my grandma's birthday) I'll be good with anytime after December 1. I'm ready for this pregnancy to be over so I can walk without pain. At least I start working from home after Thanksgiving - getting rid of the 2+ hour commute (one hour there, about an hour and a half home) will help significantly.

--- 7 ---

Collin's employer announced yesterday that they're continuing with the mandatory overtime for the next two weeks. This was after a week of all the employees assuming that it was no longer required -- that's right, they announced mandatory overtime with less than 24 hours notice. Apparently some of his co-workers are single parents and are frazzled about having to find childcare on the weekend on such short notice, one of his co-workers may have to cancel his vacation, and Collin's upset because he'd thought that he'd be able to have something resembling a relaxing weekend for a change. *sigh* It doesn't help that they're severely understaffed right now. So, prayers for stress relief and peace of mind would be appreciated.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

7 Quick Takes Friday - October 21, 2011

2011-10-21T18:00:00.001-07:00

--- 1 ---

Baby update: I had an appointment yesterday and everything looks good. His/her heartbeat was 145bpm, my bp was good, and weight is stable (actually, I've lost two pounds since my last appointment and am still about 5-6 pounds below my pre-pregnancy weight). I'm measuring right on target, which was surprising to me given that I feel like Shamu. The doctor thinks I'm just carrying this baby differently than the others, which is why I feel so big compared to past pregnancies. I also got a flu shot. Ow. My arm still hurts. I guess it beats getting influenza, though.

--- 2 ---

Well, here it is, October 21 and the world didn't end. Poor Harold Camping. Wonder what spin he'll come up with this time to excuse his invalid prediction to his followers?

--- 3 ---

We had a parent-teacher conference with Elanor's regular classroom teacher and special education instructor today. Bottom line is that she's making progress, albeit slowly. We're considering holding her back a year, depending on what progress she makes by spring. We're starting the paperwork now just in case we make the decision to do so. Generally, her teacher told us, the administration is reluctant to hold back a student, especially one with an IEP. Collin and I are both wondering if it might benefit her, though, given that she still shows significant delays when it comes to reading and writing. It's something we'll have to research more, I guess.However, her teachers repeatedly praised her imagination, her positive attitude, and her loving, happy personality, so that was nice to hear.

--- 4 ---

I finally got Elanor's school picture order (long story short, the order got lost somehow after it was delivered to the school and they finally found it):

--- 5 ---

Collin's employer has decided to extend their support hours. Worst case scenario, Collin might end up with a schedule where he's working until 11pm. The thought makes me want to cry. It's imperative that I keep the kids downstairs and quiet while he's upstairs working; I'm not going to able to put them to bed if he's working that late! I might be able to put the older kids to bed and just take the youngest into the master bedroom with me 'til he's off of work or something like that, which is not a fun prospect, given I'll still have to keep them very quiet (not sure how that will work once we have a new baby...). We can only hope and pray that he'll get a halfway decent shift (like the one he has now, 7:30am-6:30pm, 4 days per week) instead of a late night one. He can list his preferences but it's basically a randomized draw. *sigh*

--- 6 ---

Elanor starts T-ball next week. I want to get her one of these:

Back in my day I don't think they made pink-and-purple baseball gloves! I had a boring brown one when I played softball as a kid.

--- 7 ---

I do indeed have my new iPhone 4S now, and I absolutely love it. Siri is a very handy tool (and rather amusing at times). It's so much smoother, faster, and shinier than my old phone! I can't wait to use it for pictures and video of the new baby. :)

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Our Leap of Faith

2011-10-18T20:23:00.000-07:00

October 17 marked the three-year anniversary of our arrival in Arizona, and I realized that I'd never blogged about what led us here.

In the fall of 2008, my husband and Ifaced a difficult decision. The recession had detrimentally affectedboth of our jobs. At the time, I was part of a dedicated team at my work serving a specific client - Lehman Brothers. Collin was working part-time in the evenings for a local ISP and going to college full-time as well.

Lehman Brothers imploded, and I ended up taking a cut in pay and slightly reduced hours. Around the same time, Collin's employers informed him that they were eliminating all part-time positions in a few months and going to full-time positions only. As he was attending college full-time, there was no way he could accept without dropping out of school (nor did he want to accept; it was a decent job to work while in school, but not a job he wanted to do full-time).

However, school was not going well for him (calculus was proving extremely difficult) and we were struggling to make ends meet the way it was with two little kids in full-time daycare. Neither of us had prospects for betteremployment in our area. Collin and I had a long talk one evening, and he asked me how I'd feel about moving to Arizona (specifically, Surprise, in the Phoenix metro area). His brother lived there, and he and his wife were willing to provide us with a place to stay as long as we needed one. His mother lived there full-time and his grandparents wintered there. Despite the impending recession, he felt our job prospects would be better in AZ, given that it was a large metropolitan area, and he would be willing to postpone school indefinitely until we got on our feet.

I was conflicted, given that most of my family lived in the Fargo area, but there was one thing I did know: we were stagnating where we were. It seemed like no matter how hard we worked, we couldn't get ahead. Also, the winters were very hard on us -- driving to work through glare ice and snow, bundling up the kids like Eskimos every time we left the house, and Collin's bipolar disorder being exacerbated by Seasonal Affective Disorder. The climate in Arizona, in contrast, seemed like a dream.

We prayed, and talked some more, and considered all the pros and cons. Collin felt that God was leading us to AZ; I was more hesitant but I trusted him completely. I thought that if we were meant to go to AZ, then any obstacles in our path would be easily resolved -- and as it turned out, that was exactly what happened. Collin was able to withdraw from his current semester of school with no penalties (he just barely made the deadline); I found a co-worker of mine willing to take over the lease to our apartment right away so we didn't have to worry about getting out of our lease (our landlord had told us that if we could find a new renter, he'd let them take over the lease instead of charging us the standard fee for breaking the lease early). Our families, while sad that we were leaving, generously offered help with packing and moving expenses. This all came about within two weeks of our decision to move.

We gave away many of ourpossessions (including one of our cars with a dying transmission, donated to charity), packed a small moving van with what was left, and traveled 1,800 miles to the south. It ended up being a long, four-day road trip. When we arrived, we had barely $100 to our name, two small children (a three-year-old and a six-month-old) to support, and were dependent on the kindness of relatives for housing. We'd prayed hard about our move andfelt that God was guiding us in our decision, but it was still veryscary.

Once we arrived, we both began sendingout resumes and applying for jobs. Collin, a computer technicianby trade, decided one day to go to the local Catholic Church andintroduce himself to the priest. In front of the Church was a smallgarden with a statue of Mary in the center. He paused in front of thestatue to pray, and just as he finished his prayer, his cell phonerang. The call was from a recruiter at a large and successful computer company. They were calling to schedule an interview. Theinteresting part was that he had never sent them him his resume; hehadn't been aware they had any jobs available in the area. However,somehow his resume had gotten to them.

He immediately scheduled theinterview, and eventually he was offered a full-time position with asalary higher than he'd ever made before. Exactly one week later Ialso found a very good job, and within days we'd also found a four-bedroom houseto rent (a far cry from the tiny two-bedroom basement apartment we'd had in Fargo)! Neither of us think it was a coincidence that our good luckbegan after asking Mary for her intercession.

With our two good jobs, our financial situation continued to improve. We were able to invite my grandmother to spend an extended stay with us so she could escape the ND winter for a few weeks, and we loved having her as a guest in our home. (She's been back every winter since.)

In December 2009, we realized a long-cherished dream: home ownership, something we never thought would be possible for us. Our new home was located right behind our church, the parish where Collin had asked Mary for her prayers. When we were originally looking at the house, we brought the kids up to the master bedroom to look around, and our daughter pointed out the window at the beautiful view of the church and said, "Look, there's Jesus!" Collin said he knew right then and there that God meant for the house to be ours, and he was right again. Despite nine other offers on the house, ours was accepted.

In March 2010 we realized another dream -- a new sibling for our children. Soon we'll realize that dream once again. Collin was able to return to school and has been a full-time student at the University of Phoenix for a little over a year; his GPA is currently over 3.5 and he's set to graduate in 2012.

When I look back over the road we've traveled, I can't believe how our lives have changed in three short years. Moving to a new state with no jobs lined up and very little money was a huge leap of faith on our part, but it ultimately turned out to be the best decision we could have made for our family (and yes, we LOVE the weather!).

Deo gratias!

What's Wrong with this Picture?

2011-10-16T16:22:00.003-07:00

A (very liberal) Facebook friend posted the following to her wall earlier today:

I commented that the initial assertion in the graphic (specifically, "The House just passed a bill that will let a hospital refuse a woman emergency abortion care even if she will die without it") was a blatant lie, offered a link demonstrating step-by-step how it is a lie, and asked her to please not post pictures that propogate lies.

The response by her and her liberal cronies, in a nutshell?

"It's not a lie! The Protect Life Act doesn't create jobs, therefore the graphic doesn't lie!"

I sometimes wonder why I even try.

Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day

2011-10-15T11:20:00.000-07:00

Today, October 15, is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day.

Please light a candle in memory of your own lost little ones, and/or in memory of those who have lost babies, either before birth or within the first year after birth.

I've lost two children to miscarriage, Noel (December 2006) and Chris (March 2009); I think about them every day.

Image: foto76 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

7 Quick Takes Friday - October 14, 2011 - Haiku Edition

2011-10-14T12:39:00.004-07:00

--- 1 ---

New iPhone 4Sis

waiting for me at home.

4pm, come soon!

--- 2 ---

The kids watch Star Wars

over and over again.

Love this new obsession.

--- 3 ---

I'm 31 weeks.

Jeez, was I this big before?

My belly is huge.

--- 4 ---

My new goal in life:

To win a Bubble onesie.

Please, Leila Miller?? ;)

--- 5 ---

Prayed outside clinic

yesterday afternoon for

40 Days for Life

--- 6 ---

Pumpkin spice lattes

are so very, very good.

I must get one soon

--- 7 ---

Plans for tomorrow:

Sleep in, do laundry, fix bikes.

Or maybe just sleep.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

7 Quick Takes Friday - October 7, 2011

2011-10-07T13:24:00.001-07:00

--- 1 ---

30 weeks today! Baby W. has been moving around and kicking like crazy lately. I think s/he's had hiccups a few times, too.

--- 2 ---

You know how I said last week that I was hoping things would settle down this week? Well, they did to a certain degree, but it looks like the next two weeks are going to be difficult. Thanks to the release of iCloud, Collin has to work mandatory overtime for the next two weeks in addition to being in the final weeks of his most challenging college course to date. I think he's going to emerge from his office for meals, bathroom breaks, and the occasional nap, but that's about it. *sigh*

--- 3 ---

Speaking of Apple, Steve Jobs will be missed. He was a brilliant man who impacted several different entire industries -- and his company treats their employees quite well to boot. Prayers for his soul, and for his family in their time of grief.

--- 4 ---

Speaking of Apple once again, Collin ordered my birthday/Christmas present this morning (a white one, 64GB - I thought I was getting a 32 GB one but he decided to go for broke).

So. Excited. It should arrive October 14!

--- 5 ---

I had an intensely painful charley horse at 2am this morning. Ow. I swear it hurt worse than labor contractions did.

I hate that particular pregnancy symptom. The weird thing is that Collin woke this morning with a bad charley horse too! Must've been a sympathy one.

--- 6 ---

I read a birth story earlier this week that simultaneously made me laugh and freaked me out. It's called, "Is That My Uterus in that Taurus?"

I think it freaked me out because I came uncomfortably close to having a similar birth story with Violet, and I'm nervous that my labor this time around might go even faster. I really don't want to give birth in the car if I can help it.

--- 7 ---

Potluck tonight for the marriage prep group. We're bringing Beer-Braised Kielbasa, mainly because I KNOW the kids will eat it.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

7 Quick Takes Friday - September 30, 2011

2011-09-30T10:30:00.001-07:00

--- 1 ---

It's been one of those weeks. I have a huge project due at work that I've been frantically working on this week, putting in many extra hours; Collin's in the midst of a particularly challenging college class that's requiring HIM to put in many extra hours, our van got a flat tire, Violet's teething and ran a high fever yesterday, so couldn't go to daycare (I managed to work from home and still put in 13 hours while caring for her), and my doctor's office told me I was anemic and needed iron supplements. I'm really hoping things will marginally calm down once this week is over.

--- 2 ---

Two pieces of good news this week, though: we asked two of our close friends (the couple who run the marriage prep program at our parish) to be Baby W.'s godparents, and they said they'd be honored. I'm so happy they said yes.

My father e-mailed me to let me know he bought his plane tickets for Christmas -- he'll be here from December 24 to January 3! I'm so excited to see him!

I'm going to see if we can arrange to get the baby baptized while he's here. Usually, babies are only baptized once a month at our parish (usually something like the third Sunday at the 11am Mass), but we had Violet's baptism on a Wednesday evening so that my sister and her husband could attend (they had flown in from ND).

However, one of Baby W.'s godparents is also the baptism coordinator at our parish as well as the son of the permanent deacon who will probably be doing the baptism, so I think we should be able to swing an exception. ;)

--- 3 ---

We're doing another talk for the marriage prep participants tonight - this one on Intimacy and Sexuality, a talk we've given several times before. Since we've been on both sides of the fence, so to speak (contracepting as non-Catholics and using NFP as Catholics), we enjoy sharing our testimony about how freeing and wonderful NFP has been for us as well as sharing authentic Church teaching regarding intimacy and sexuality. We haven't had much time to prepare (see #1), though, so I'm hoping we can kind of wing it this time around. :)

--- 4 ---

Even though this is Baby #4, I've had several people ask me if we have a baby registry. The answer is, kind of, but since we have everything we NEED at this point, the list is generally comprised of stuff it'd be nice to have but aren't necessities. (The one exception is a boy's baptismal outfit... but I'm not going to know if we'll need one or not until s/he arrives! Really, baby can be baptized wearing a simple white onesie, so even that's more of a want than a need.)

Hope this doesn't come across as gift-grubbing or anything (like I said, we have everything we need), but since several people have asked I thought I'd put it out there.

--- 5 ---

I can't believe it's almost October. I have William's Halloween costume already (he's going to be Spiderman), and Violet will wear the cow costume William wore at her age. Elanor is still undecided, although I'm trying to encourage her to be Princess Tiana again, as I think the dress she wore last year will still fit.

If anyone is interested, I have the following costumes available to lend out: a girl's 4-5 Cinderella dress (a little worn as Elanor used it to play dress-up until she grew out of it), a girl's 4-5 Minnie Mouse dress, good condition (both are basically Wal-Mart cheapies - I think I have a Minnie Mouse ear hairband thing somewhere too), a pretty ragged 9-12 month size bumblebee costume, a size 3T frog costume (Old Navy brand), and a size 6-9 month Tinkerbell dress from the Disney store. Pictures available upon request. :)

--- 6 ---

I should not read Peggy Vincent's Baby Catcher right before bed. I had such weird dreams all involving childbirth last night. The only one I can really remember is that Leila and I were pregnant at the same time and due on the same day (which, bizarrely, was true with our toddlers before we met).

In my dream, we were both two weeks from our due date, and we both went to the hospital with contractions 4 minutes apart. We even shared the same room. Leila ended up giving birth to a boy with a full head of black hair named Micah (I think there's actually a birth story along those lines in the book), but my labor stopped and I got sent home to wait a few more weeks! After that the dream was kind of jumbled -- I think my family went camping? -- and I was wailing and gnashing my teeth about being 4 days overdue and how it was so unfair because Leila had her baby two weeks ago! Then I woke up.

(Leila, I'm pretty sure I'm not prophetic, so I wouldn't worry.) ;)

--- 7 ---

I'd like to thank Jissa from Blessed Be Lord for praying for me the last few months. :) Your prayers have been felt and appreciated!

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Prayer Buddy Reveal

2011-09-29T17:18:00.001-07:00

I signed up to be a Prayer Buddy for the first time last month, and since then I've been blessed to pray for Tess from The Lighthouse. Tess, I tried to pray for you every day -- sometimes pregnancy brain interfered and I forgot, but I think I remembered most days. :)

Happy Feast of the Archangels!

A Response to Lisa Graas Re: "The Moral to this Story"

2011-09-26T11:51:00.000-07:00

Lisa made a number of unkind, uncharitable, and outright untrue accusations toward me in her most recent blog post. Given that she turned comments off, I’m unable to respond at her blog so I will have to do so here in hopes that anyone who reads her unjust accusations will also find my rebuttal to them.

1. “If I were to now go and kill myself it would not be because of ‘Bipolarphobia’ on the part of Joann [sic] for demonizing me based on my disorder, though she did do that.”

Apparently, Lisa’s definition of “dehumanizing” someone with Bipolar disorder is to do the following:

State that your husband (of 10 years and counting) has Bipolar Disorder.
State that, based on the fact above, you have learned to recognize the signs of when someone’s meds may be out of whack and may need adjusting.
State that you have seen signs of increased paranoia and excessive self-recrimination based on perceived insults in someone’s comments (see Lisa’s comment from September 26, 2011 at 1:22 am on this post, for example), and that such rants and ramblings, in your experience, can be an indication of instability on the part of the person with Bipolar Disorder, a sign that that person's current treatment regimen may not be adequate for their needs.
Suggest that perhaps that someone may need to visit her doctor to explore the possibility of a medication adjustment and/or new medication, in case the emotional instability has a medical cause.

The dictionary definition of “dehumanize” is: “to deprive of human qualities, personality, or spirit.” Given the facts above, I fail to see how Lisa’s accusation that I “dehumanized” her is accurate. I made no judgments regarding the state of her soul, her human qualities, her personality , or her spirit; I suggested that her WRITTEN COMMENTS indicated that her admitted medical condition might be affecting her judgment and ability to be rational, based on my ten years of experience living with and intimately knowing someone who also has her particular medical condition.

2. “I am not what they think I am, therefore I will not kill myself. I know my value and dignity before God.”

Lisa suggested here that I stated that she has no value or dignity before God. This is false. I made no comments regarding her inherent worth and dignity as a human being and beloved child of God. My suggestions that she seek additional treatment for her medical disorder was in no way a reflection of her inherent worth and dignity as a beloved child of God. I am glad to know she won’t kill herself.

3. “Leila and Joann [sic] have Bipolarphobia and wish to instruct me on my need to be aware of'homophobia'. People are not brutalizing people with same-sex attraction who are dealing with it in a holy manner. If that EVER happened, the word 'homophobia' might possibly be a legitimate term.”

First of all, the assertion that I have “Bipolarphobia” would be news to my husband, who has had Bipolar disorder since before our marriage 10 years ago. You would think that my having "Bipolarphobia" would have resulted in his suicide by now, if Lisa is to be believed, yet we're still very happily married.

Second of all, what I wish to instruct Lisa on is the fact that bigotry and hatred against homosexuals does exist regardless of whether or not she acknowledges it. If it did not exist, I fail to see why the Catholic Church would state that ALL homosexuals, EVEN THOSE WHO ARE COMMITTING HOMOSEXUAL ACTS, “must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided” (CCC 2358). Lisa seems to believe that only homosexuals living chastely deserve respect, compassion, and dignity – which make her comments above regarding her own value and dignity before God despite her Bipolar disorder truly ironic.

Unlike Lisa, I believe that all homosexuals, not just the ones who are chaste, have inherent value and dignity. That does not mean that I condone homosexual acts, but that I believe people have inherent value and dignity despite their sins, regardless of what those sins may be.Lisa claims to be “listening to the Church.” However, the Church has said: “It is deplorable that homosexual persons have been and are the object of violent malice in speech or in action. Such treatment deserves condemnation from the Church's pastors wherever it occurs. It reveals a kind of disregard for others which endangers the most fundamental principles of a healthy society. The intrinsic dignity of each person must always be respected in word, in action and in law.” (source)

Note that this paragraph makes no distinction between chaste homosexuals and practicing homosexuals, as Lisa does. It states that violent malice in speech and in action against homosexuals deserves condemnation wherever it occurs, regardless if the homosexuals in question are chaste or practicing. THIS is the Church’s definition of homophobia. This is the true, authentic definition of homophobia, but Lisa refuses to understand that. She will only accept the definition of homophobia as propagated by the liberal media instead of listening to what the Church says.

I’m sorry, Lisa, but I defer to the Church in this matter. I condemn violent malice in speech and in action against ANYONE – be they practicing homosexual, chaste homosexual, person with Bipolar disorder, etc. I’m sorry you cannot do the same. If you choose to go against the Church with your opinions, then all I can do is include you in my prayers that you will one day come to understand that violent malice, in word or in action, against ANYONE due to their sins is unacceptable.

7 Quick Takes Friday - September 23, 2011

2011-09-23T14:54:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. Collin and Violet had a good trip to ND. The flight there went well (apparently several other passengers commented on how good she was!); the flight back wasn't quite so good as Violet was tired and cranky but refusing sleep. However, they survived intact and even had a fun time. :)

Violet got to spend time with a lot of relatives, including Grandma Jan (my mom) with whom she hit it off really well:

2. I actually had a really productive weekend without a toddler around - go figure! - and got almost all the way caught up on laundry (we had a HUGE backlog; most if it, I'm sad to say, was on our bedroom floor). Collin was shocked and surprised when he walked into a sparkling clean bedroom on Monday night.

3. Oh, I don't think I talked about Elanor's latest stunt. About two weeks ago, she cut Violet's hair. As in, she cut off all of Violet's beautiful blond curls from the back of her head. I loved those curls so I was pretty upset. All things considered, it could have been worse -- she left the front and sides of her hair largely alone. We took Violet to Snip N Snap for Kids to repair the damage and the stylist was actually quite impressed at Elanor's skill; she said it was a good job for a six-year-old!

4. I remembered a funny story from Disneyland that I forgot to share last week. We encountered Alice and the Mad Hatter in Fantasyland, and stopped to get autographs. Elanor went right over to Alice and gave her a hug, and the Hatter said, "Tell your friend [meaning William] to come over too and we'll take a picture." Elanor looked at him and said, "He's not my friend; he's my brother." The crowd around us, including the characters, cracked up.

5. 40 Days for Life begins next week! I'm going to try to commit to praying at an AZ location once a week, probably Tuesday or Thursday afternoon at the Glendale location (specific day/time depends on my doctor appointments - I go every two weeks now). If any of you in the Phoenix area want to join me, let me know! It's nice to have company.

Speaking of 40 Days for Life, Jennifer Fulweiler wrote an excellent article for the National Catholic Register blog called "What I Learned From Praying in Front of an Abortion Clinic." I've written before about my experiences.

6. I did my glucose tolerance test (ugh) on Monday; haven't gotten the results yet but I assume they'd have called by now if they were abnormal. I had a regular appointment on Monday as well; the baby's heartbeat was 140bpm and my OB said, "That sounds like a happy baby." :) We also talked about my desire not to be induced in the extremely unlikely event that I go past 41 weeks (I never have before), and he's fine with that as long as I do twice-weekly non-stress tests to make sure the baby's okay.

I also reiterated my desire for an unmedicated childbirth with as few interventions as possible, and he's also fine with that (although he did ask me to head to the hospital a bit sooner this time around, as last time I arrived at the hospital fully dilated and ready to push, and he barely got there in time!). I heart my OB.

7. Collin and I are giving a talk on "Morals and Values in Marriage" for our parish's marriage prep program tonight. Please say a prayer for us!

Joe Mizzi's Response

2011-09-21T10:14:00.000-07:00

Dr. Mizzi responded, very politely, to my e-mail regarding his NFP article. His response (in green) and my subsequent reply are below (notes in italics are were not included in my reply to him).

Dear Joanna,

Thank you for your letter.

It is too long to answer you on every point.

[I doubt this, as his original article was several pages long and my response was only a few paragraphs. I think he's deflecting my points because he's stymied on how to answer them.]

If you could just answer these two questions, I'd appreciate it:

1. Given that all Christian denominations taught that contraception was immoral until 1930, did God (a) change His mind or (b) allow Christians to believe and teach false doctrine for over 1,900 years?

2. Since spontaneous abortion (miscarriage) occurs naturally (just as the infertile phase of a woman's cycle does), does that mean that induced abortion is also acceptable?

Do not couples using NFP deliberately frustrate the natural purpose of the conjugal act by time sexual intercourse to the safe period? Is not their purpose to prevent pregnancy

Well of course that is exactly their purpose!

[What's interesting here is that he's addressing a point I've already conceded to as if I am disputing it. Note that in my original e-mail to him, I explicitly said that spacing pregnancy was not, in and of itself, an objectively evil or immoral end. I'm not sure if he misunderstood my point or if he's deliberately trying to steer the conversation away from the actual point. I'm going to stay the course, however...]

It is not sinful or intrinsically immoral to desire to space pregnancies for just reasons; moreover, the marital act has DUAL purposes: procreative and unitive, not just the former.

What is sinful is the deliberate frustration of the marital act (i.e., sexual intercourse). When a couple uses NFP to aid in periodic abstinence, they are not deliberately frustrating the marital act because no marital act is taking place. Contraception, however, always frustrates a marital act, either in anticipation of the act (e.g., the Pill, IUDs, diaphragms), during the act itself (e.g., condoms or withdrawl) or after the marital act has taken place (e.g., the "morning-after" Pill).

[I hope he replies, at the very least, to the two questions I sent him... I'm interested to know his answers.]

Responding to Joe Mizzi - "An Evaluation of Natural Family Planning"

2011-09-19T17:15:00.003-07:00

Because I'm a glutton for punishment, I subscribe to the "Just for Catholics" newsletter in which Joe Mizzi, a former Catholic, tries to persuade Catholics how wrong they are. Dr. Mizzi and I have had a couple of brief e-mail exchanges and I found him to be a sincere, if misguided, individual (unlike professional anti-Catholic Mike Gendron, who became progressively more rude and irrational in his responses to me).

He recently sent out an article titled, "An Evaluation of Natural Family Planning" (note: opens as a PDF) in which he attempts to prove that NFP and certain forms of contraception are no different from one another (and thus the Catholic Church is wrong to teach that all contraception is immoral). To his credit, he condemns contraception that is potentially abortive, and for that I commend him. However, his points are illogical and unpersuasive, and I sent him the below e-mail in an attempt to point out some of the flaws in his argument.

Dear Dr. Mizzi:

I read this document and found several aspects of it puzzling.

For example, this excerpt:

The basic moral difference between periodic abstinence and artificial methods of birth control is given in Humanae Vitae, 16: „In the former the married couple rightly use a faculty provided them by nature. In the later they obstruct the natural development of the generative process.‟ The basic difference is not in the motive – parents can use either method to avoid pregnancy for some just reason – but in the means to reach that same goal. Since nature already provides a faculty to prevent pregnancy, and since it in certain circumstances it is desirable and good to avoid pregnancy, the Catholic objection to contraception is unsustainable.

I don't understand how anything you say in this paragraph leads to the conclusion that "the Catholic objection to contraception is unsustainable." Pope Pius XI said in Casti Connubii (all emphasis mine):

54. But no reason, however grave, may be put forward by which anything intrinsically against nature may become conformable to nature and morally good. Since, therefore, the conjugal act is destined primarily by nature for the begetting of children, those who in exercising it deliberately frustrate its natural power and purpose sin against nature and commit a deed which is shameful and intrinsically vicious.

and

56. ... Any use whatsoever of matrimony exercised in such a way that the act is deliberately deprived of its natural power to generate life is an offense against the law of God and of nature, and those who indulge in such are branded with the guilt of a grave sin.

Note the words "deliberately frustrate" and "deliberately deprived." Couples who use NFP are doing nothing to deliberately frustrate the marital act. In fact, it is impossible to do so, for no act is being performed -- an act is being abstained from, but that is not the same as engaging in the marital act and taking steps, either in anticipation of the act or after it has taken place, to deliberately frustrate the natural power and purpose. Condoms, for example, deliberately frustrate the natural power of the marital act by preventing the sperm from entering the woman's vaginal canal. With NFP, however, nothing artificial (like a barrier of latex) is preventing conception from occurring naturally. The only thing that MAY prevent conception is the fact that ovulation either has not yet occurred or has already taken place, and that naturally-occurring cycle was put in place by God and not altered by either the husband or the wife. Given this distinction, I really don't see how you can logically say that condoms are no different from NFP, and your article doesn't really specify either. (Also, your article fails to mention that NFP can also be used to ACHIEVE pregnancy -- my husband and I have used it several times for that purpose. What other method of birth control is also used to ACHIEVE pregnancy?)

I do, however, commend you for condemning those means of contraception which are potentially abortive -- many of your Protestant brethren do not do so.

In brief, there is no essential difference between periodic abstinence and artificial methods of birth control. Both can be used for exactly the same purpose. Moreover there is no moral difference between the means employed, whether „natural‟ or „artificial‟, since it is right to suppress normal body functions for the right reason, and in any case, nature itself imposes limits on human fertility.

You're partially right with this statement in that spacing births is not an objectively evil end. However, I do disagree with you that the means are exactly the same. With condoms and other forms of contraception, couples seek to deliberately frustrate, through artificial means, the two dual purposes of the marital act (unity of the spouses, and procreative capability). With NFP, no such deliberate frustration is happening. The couple is merely taking advantage of the woman's natural periods of fertility or infertility in the cycle created by God (who could have chosen to make women fertile 24/7, but did not). There is no deliberate frustration going on as there is with contraception, because each and every act is open and unhindered to the possibility of conception, however remote that possibility may be.

I also find your comparison to appetite suppressants to be weak. If a person is using an appetite suppressant, it is because s/he is attempting to suppress an unnaturally or abnormally large appetite. (Also, one should not be using appetite suppressants if their appetite is healthy; rather, they should simply abstain from unhealthy or high-calorie foods as befits the virtue of temperance.) As you note in your piece, the Catholic Church has no problem with using drugs or medicines in order to restore heath or cure an illness. Contraception, when used for the purpose of spacing pregnancy, is not being used to cure a disease or health problem; rather, it is being used to subvert normal, healthy, functioning fertility. NFP, on the other hand, allows couples to space births by practicing periodic abstinence, which is praised by St. Paul (1 Corinthians 7:5).

You also state in your article that "the second purpose [procreation] is not always present in nature and it should not be forced on the intent of the conjugal act."

It's interesting to note that this is the exact same argument many "pro-choice Christians" use to justify abortion. They argue that since embryonic or fetal death occurs in nature via spontaneous abortion (i.e., miscarriage), we are fully justified in aborting children via induced abortion. It seems, in order to be logically consistent, if you use this "not always present in nature" argument for contraception, you must also use it in favor of abortion - yet your article seems to indicate you consider abortion immoral. How do you reconcile this logical contradiction?

Also, you state, "The facts of history prove that the position of the Catholic Church has also changed dramatically" but none of the facts you present prove this statement. The Catholic Church has never taught as official doctrine that it is objectively evil or immoral to space pregnancy, only that it was wrong to deliberately frustrate procreation (e.g., by obtaining "potions of sterility" or by spilling one's seed on the ground, like Onan). The Church has consistently taught, as St. Paul did, that mutual abstinence has been acceptable as long as both spouses consent and there is no danger of either falling into lust and being tempted as a result of said abstinence.

Given that the Church has never taught that spacing pregnancy in and of itself was objectively evil or immoral, Her teachings did not "change dramatically" at all. Once scientists learned that it was possible to discern a woman's potential fertility via outward signs, the Church continued to teach that periodic abstinence was acceptable for spacing births, and that it was not a sin to practice periodic abstinence in conjunction with discerning a woman's natural fertility or infertility based on outward signs. See Fr. Brian Harrison's excellent article, "Is NFP A Heresy?" for a more thorough explanation.

Moreover, given that every Christian denomination taught that all contraception - abortifacent or otherwise - was objectively immoral until 1930, it seems that Christian denominations who currently teach that contraception is acceptable in any form either believe that God changed His mind or that God allowed Christians to believe and teach false doctrine for over 1,900 years. Which of these is your position? Your article doesn't say.

My friend Leila wrote an excellent blog post on this topic which you may find informative. Another excellent, thorough article is Dr. Janet Smith's Contraception: Why Not? I hope you take the time to read and consider the points made in both.

Sincerely yours,

JoAnna Wahlund

7 Quick Takes Friday - September 16, 2011

2011-09-16T00:08:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I'm up way too late because I'm packing a suitcase for Collin & Violet. Tomorrow they fly to Fargo, ND to attend Collin's cousin's wedding. (Too expensive for all of us to go, but Violet can still fly as a lap baby, so...)

2, I've never been separated from Violet overnight before, and it's hard. I know she'll be in good hands, but... but. She's my baby. (I'll miss Collin too, of course... but I've left him overnight before so it's not quite as hard. :P)

3. I had to say goodbye to her already because she'll still be sleeping when I leave for work tomorrow. They'll return late Monday night. Please pray that they have a safe trip, and that Violet behaves as well as an 18-month-old can in those circumstances.

4. Okay, I need to talk about something else or I'm going to start sobbing. Let me tell a couple of fun stories from our vacation.

5. When we arrived at the San Diego zoo, it was early afternoon the Sunday of Labor Day weekend. The parking lot was literally overflowing with cars. We circled the lot for 30 minutes but had no luck getting a space. I remembered reading a blog post about St. Boniface being the patron saint of getting a parking space (really!) so I began silently asking him for his intercession as we continued to circle the lot.

About five minutes after I started to pray, we caught sight of a car pulling out of the second row of the parking lot, and we managed to claim it. Thank you, God, and thank you, St. Boniface. It's nice to have friends in high places!

6. On Labor Day evening, the kids and I returned to the hotel around 8pm because we were all exhausted (Collin came with us, but planned to return to Disneyland for a few more hours once we were settled). After Collin left, I was flipping through channels to try and find something the kids could watch. As it was late evening, I couldn't find anything very kid-appropriate, not even on the Disney channel (one of the Hannah Montana-type shows was on, YUCK). As I flipped through again, I caught sight of a familiar image:

Elanor immediately said, "Oh, yes, the spaceship show. Let's watch that." So we did. It was a very, very proud moment for me. (The episode, for the Trekkies out there, was Timescape.) It was Star Trek: The Next Generation -- literally!

7. William absolutely loved seeing the pandas at the Zoo. A few days ago, while we were in the van driving home from daycare, he told me the following: "We saw a panda eating bamboo when we were at the San Diego Zoo. Pandas eat bamboo. We saw a panda sleeping, and another panda eating a lot of bamboo! Pandas are bears. Some bears eat children, and that's just rude."

I laughed until I nearly cried at the last line. (I have no idea where he got the "bears eat children" line from... probably his dad, I'm guessing. :P)

Okay, back to packing, and eventually bed. Ugh... 5am is going to come way too soon.

9/11/01

2011-09-11T10:37:00.000-07:00

Collin and I had been married for exactly 11 days. We were living in a small one-bedroom apartment in Minneapolis, MN, where I was a student at the University of Minnesota-Twin Cities and Collin worked as a contractor for a local IT company.

I remember my alarm, set to a local radio station, going off... I can't remember the time but I think it was around 7:30am. The only thing I heard before I hit the snooze button was, "A plane has hit the World Trade Center." Great, I remember thinking grumpily, some idiot in a Cessna went off course and has managed to kill himself.

I got up and fired up my computer, intending to check my e-mail quickly before getting ready for the day. My homepage was set to Yahoo.com and the pictures of an airliner flying into the first Tower leaped out at me immediately. I stared at them uncomprehendingly for a few minutes, then switched on the TV and started watching the news coverage. Then I went to wake up Collin and told him what was happening. He got up to watch the news coverage as well, and the two of us just held each other and watched the news in silence. We watched, live, as the second tower fell. Finally, I had to hurry up and get ready so I wouldn't miss my bus to campus.

As it turned out, I really didn't need to rush... shortly after I arrived on campus, I found that they were shutting it down for the day in memory of all those who had died in the attacks. So I took the bus back home.

As far as I remember, Collin and I spent the day moping around the apartment, just trying to process what had happened. I remember being so thankful that nothing like this had happened to the guests who had flown in for our wedding less than two weeks before. I wondered if Collin and I would begin our married life in a nation embroiled in war.

Photo source

On September 12, 2001, John Paul II said,

Yesterday was a dark day in the history of humanity, a terrible affront to human dignity. After receiving the news, I followed with intense concern the developing situation, with heartfelt prayers to the Lord. How is it possible to commit acts of such savage cruelty? The human heart has depths from which schemes of unheard-of ferocity sometimes emerge, capable of destroying in a moment the normal daily life of a people. But faith comes to our aid at these times when words seem to fail. Christ’s word is the only one that can give a response to the questions which trouble our spirit. Even if the forces of darkness appear to prevail, those who believe in God know that evil and death do not have the final say. Christian hope is based on this truth; at this time our prayerful trust draws strength from it.

He also offered this prayer:

Brothers and Sisters, in great dismay, before the horror of destructive violence, but strong in the faith that has always guided our fathers, we turn to the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, salvation of his people, and with the confidence of children, pray that He will come to our aid in these days of mourning and innocent suffering.

1. For the Churches of the East and the West, and in particular for the Church in the United States of America so that, though humbled by loss and mourning, yet inspired by the Mother of the Lord, strong woman beside the cross of her Son, they may foster the will for reconciliation, peace, and the building of the civilization of love.

2. For all those who bear the name of Christian, so that, in the midst of many persons who are tempted to hatred and doubt, they will be witnesses to the presence of God in history and the victory of Christ over death.

3. For the leaders of nations, so that they will not allow themselves to be guided by hatred and the spirit of retaliation, but may do everything possible to prevent new hatred and death, by bringing forth works of peace.

4. For those who are weeping in sorrow over the loss of relatives and friends, that in this hour of suffering they will not be overcome by sadness, despair and vengeance, but continue to have faith in the victory of good over evil, of life over death.

5. For those suffering and wounded by the terrorist acts, that they may return to stability and health and, appreciating the gift of life, may generously foster the will to contribute to the well being of every human being.

6. For our brothers and sisters who met death in the folly of violence, that they find sure joy and life everlasting in the peace of the Lord, that their death may not be in vain but become a leaven bringing forth a season of brotherhood and collaboration among peoples.

O Lord Jesus, remember our deceased and suffering brothers before your Father.
Remember us also, as we begin to pray with your words: Pater noster...

O Almighty and merciful God, you cannot be understood by one who sows discord, you cannot be accepted by one who loves violence: look upon our painful human condition tried by cruel acts of terror and death, comfort your children and open our hearts to hope, so that our time may again know days of serenity and peace.
Through Christ our Lord.

Amen.

7 Quick Takes Friday - September 9, 2011

2011-09-09T08:39:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

I uploaded over 100 vacation pictures to Facebook last night! If you're my FB friend, you can see them here, but here are some of my favorites from the non-Disneyland portions of our trip (I'll probably do a follow-up post later on this week with our Disneyland pictures -- there are too many for a QT post!)


Waiting in line at Sea World... aren't they cute?

We were waiting in line to feed dolphins!! Elanor LOVED doing this. William took one look at their teeth and flatly refused (he was firmly convinced they were going to eat HIM), and Violet didn't really seem to care. So just Collin, Elanor, and I fed them (we got to touch them, too!). Such a great experience!

Sea World had little signs in all their vegetation indicating what types of plants were around... when I saw this, I couldn't resist! She's wet because she had just finished playing in the jumping fountains at the Sesame Street Bay of Play... definitely her favorite spot! She pitched a tantrum when we moved on to a different part of the park.

I met up with my friend Melanie at the San Diego Zoo! We have known each other online for over 10 years, but this was the first time we had actually met in person. We had so much fun hanging out!

A Zoo shot of my favorite people in the world. :)

We rode the San Diego Zoo Skyfari, and part of the gorgeous view included this building. I've tried Googling but can't figure out what it is. Looks like an Orthodox Church, but maybe it's a museum or something? Anyone know?

On our last day, we decided to head to the beach for a little while. We discovered Little Corona Beach and it was just perfect. Small, secluded, and not very crowded at all. We had a wonderful time swimming in the Pacific!

7 Quick Takes Friday - September 2, 2011 - Vacation Quick Takes

2011-09-02T07:00:00.002-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

Well, we're off to San Diego today! I'm already in lazy vacation mode, so I'm going to slap up a couple YouTube videos that I like and call it good. :) Enjoy!

1. We celebrated 10 years of marriage yesterday! (That means we've been married 50 years in celebrity marriage years, right?)

2. Here's a blast from my past: Kristin Chenoweth singing "Taylor the Latte Boy." I LOVED this song circa 1999 or so. In fact, I still find it pretty hilarious.

3. Another blast from my past - Rockapella performing "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?" I watched that show every day when I was a kid. I wanted to to marry the bass singer (Barry Carl).

4. One of my all-time favorite movie scenes. I wish I could get this on MP3.

5. When looking for the above clip, I saw this one on the suggestions tab. Talk about chills! Further Googling revealed that it's Deanna Durbin in the movie "It's a Date." What an incredible voice she has!

6. This is so adorable. I love this kid.

7. Here's another Cover Tune Grab Bag from MercyMe that perfectly fits my vacation mode (and takes place at one of the spots in which we'll be vacationing!). Enjoy!

What a Difference a Decade Makes

2011-09-01T04:51:00.000-07:00

Ten years ago today, I walked down the aisle a single woman...

...and walked up it a married woman.

After the ceremony, we laughed...

...and relaxed...

...and had cake*...

*Actually, all but the top layer of cake is styrofoam. I didn't like buttercream frosting so we served cheesecake instead. We tried saving the cake and eating it on our first anniversary, but it was disgusting.

...and kissed...

...and had fun hamming it up for the camera during our wedding dance (which was, inadvertently, Harry Potter-themed).

But we had no idea how much our lives would change in the span of 10 short years, or that we'd go from this:

to this:

....plus one:

We've done an incredible amount of growing, changing, and learning since our marriage, and I can't thank God enough for the incredible blessings He has given us during our journey. Without Him in our marriage, I fear it would have crumbled long before we reached this point. Our journey to Catholicism has made us stronger as individuals, but it's also made us infinitely stronger as "one flesh."

Here's to ten great years... and, God willing, many decades more.

7 Quick Takes Friday - August 26, 2011

2011-08-26T09:43:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. 24 weeks today! Hello, viability! Not that I'm worried about an extremely premature birth, but it's nice to know that Baby's chances of surviving and thriving outside the womb, should something happen, are improving day by day.

2. Not to turn this into yet another ranty Quick Takes, but I'm peeved about two bits of news I got at my appointment on Tuesday. my next appointment at 27 weeks and change is the glucose test. They've changed the test so that now it's a TWO-hour wait instead of one hour, and I have to fast from midnight on. I'm not a very happy camper about that; it just seems so contrived. I had to schedule the appointment for 1pm due to my work schedule, so how is fasting for twelve hours and then drinking a super-sugary drink an accurate reflection of how my body processes glucose? Wouldn't it be more accurate for me to eat normally and then wolf down a couple Twix bars (yum), and THEN test my glucose level? I don't get it.

3. I also have to go in the following week (the week after my glucose test) to get the RhoGam shot. They can't do it at the same appointment as my glucose test, apparently, because my OB has a new policy that all patients have to have their blood drawn and sent to the (out-of-office) lab for confirmation of Rh- type before getting it. Which, for new patients, I understand. However, I was this same doctor's patient while pregnant with Violet (he delivered her, AND ordered both of the RhoGam shots I had during and after my pregnancy with her), and I really doubt that my blood type has changed from O- to something else in the last two years. It just seems like a waste of everyone's time and my insurance company's money.

4. Anyway, I know in the grand scheme of things there are a lot worse problems to have, but still. It's annoying. In other news, I finally took my first belly shot for this pregnancy a few days ago:

Here's hoping that I don't get mistaken for Shamu while at Sea World (ba dum bum ching!).

5. Babies "R" Us is having a trade-in sale! I'm thrilled because we hung on to Violet's old infant car seat hoping that they'd have one of these promotions eventually. Now we can get rid of her old one and buy a new car seat for the baby, with a decent discount attached. I'm thinking of maybe trading in the stroller too and just getting a whole new travel system... the stroller still works fine but it is getting kind of old and beat up (we've had it since 2004). I'll have to see what Collin wants to do, though.

6. We leave for our summer vacation one week from today! Woohoo! I'm ready for a break.

7. I can't think of anything else to write, so I'm going to post a commercial from YouTube that both Collin and I thoroughly enjoyed:

7 Quick Takes Friday - August 19, 2011 - the Cranky edition

2011-08-19T08:13:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

As you may be able to tell from the above image (credit where credit is due), this will not be the cheeriest of Quick Takes.

1. I had a fairly bizarre e-mail conversation with Mike Gendron, a fallen-away Catholic who now leads an anti-Catholic organization called "Proclaiming the Gospel Ministries" (the website is www.pro-gospel.org, but I don't recommend visiting... the less hits that guy gets, the better; instead, visit John Martignoni's Bible Christian Society to get a good idea of the false information he [Gendron] disseminates).

At any rate, I posted my exchange with him at the Catholic Answers Forums if anyone's interested in reading (it spans several posts so be sure to read all of the thread to see the whole thing). Notice how he refuses to answer any direct questions and changes topic whenever cornered with something he can't answer?

This guy is truly deluded and could use some serious prayers.

2. Then, on Jill Stanek's blog, I replied to her post regarding that awful story in the New York Times about the woman who aborted one of her twins because she apparently didn't feel like having two babies (ugh). A rabid pro-IVF supporter named "Maria" and I had a back-and-forth conversation in which she made this accusation:

And to Joanna, you have been pregnant six times, that you know about, because you got a positive pregnancy test, because the embryo implanted. You actually intentionally caused the death of many more embryos if you had unprotected sex more than 6 times. You can sugercoat [sic] it and call it a miscarriage if it makes you sleep better at night, but by your logic, the simple fact that you deliberately took that chance of having unprotected sex more than the 6 times you were pregnant makes you a baby killer like me.

Yeah, that's right. Apparently, if I have ever conceived a child that did not implant, it was my fault that the baby died because... I should have contracepted so that s/he didn't get conceived in the first place? The whole conversation is just one long ride on the crazy-train.

3. Here's a gem from a pro-abortion advocate at Leila's blog, during a discussion about the humanity of the unborn: "But that zygote that I started out as wasn't me."

"The illogic, it burns us, precious!"

4. Oh, hey, did you know that "the National Organization of Marriage (NOM) [...] has prepared a campaign pledge that calls for Republican candidates to promise to 'investigate' gay Americans if elected president?" So says this "news" site.

Interestingly enough, if you read the actual text of the one-page, six-paragraph pledge, it doesn't say that at all! Rather, the candidate promises to "establish a presidential commission on religious liberty to investigate and document reports of Americans who have been harassed or threatened for exercising key civil rights to organize, to speak, to donate or to vote for marriage and to propose new protections, if needed."

Can someone please explain to me how investigating harassment and civil rights abuses equates to "investigating gays"? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Somehow I don't think the MSM will be very quick to expose the lies of this so-called news source.

5. Apparently, Ron Paul has suddenly ceased to exist. In an eerie Sixth Sense-like plot development, Jon Stewart is the only one who can see him:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Indecision 2012 - Corn Polled Edition - Ron Paul & the Top Tier

www.thedailyshow.com

Daily Show Full Episodes

Political Humor & Satire Blog

The Daily Show on Facebook

I'm not a rabid Ron Paul supporter, but for crying out loud, the guy deserves to be treated as a viable candidate given his poll numbers.

6. And don't even get me started on this guy who claims that pro-lifers aren't morally consistent unless we start killing abortionists to save babies (because not doing so means we don't care about saving babies, apparently). Sigh.

7. To end my depressing Quick Takes, a Dilbert cartoon that further serves to convince me that Scott Adams has hidden cameras at my place of employment:

It all makes sense now.

If you'll excuse me, I think I need to go spend time with my two favorite men, Ben & Jerry (in lieu of a big glass of wine...).

7 Quick Takes Friday - August 12, 2011

2011-08-12T11:44:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I posted yesterday about the fall 2011 40 Days for Life campaign here in AZ. There are six locations this year (I think there were only four last year), and one is quite near to where I work, so I think I may alternate between that location and the one I was praying at last year.

There's also a link in my post to where non-Arizonans can find vigil locations in other states, so be sure to check it out!

2. Speaking of AZ pro-life issues, the Arizona Court of Appeals voted 3-0 to uphold abortion restrictions in AZ, including a ban on nurse practitioners performing surgical abortions (more info here). I read some of the decision and found a claim from Planned Parenthood of AZ (PPAZ) that made my jaw drop:

¶39 PPAZ challenges the requirement that “[a]n individual who is not a physician shall not perform a surgical abortion.” A.R.S. § 36-2153(C). PPAZ argues that because registered nurse practitioners (RNPs) have a comparable safety record when performing some surgical abortions, the requirement does not further the state’s interest in ensuring that abortions are performed safely.

What? In what other medical context is it permissible for an RNP to perform surgery?

Currently, I'm regularly seeing a nurse practitioner in my OB's office for my prenatal care, and I'd actually love for her to actually deliver the baby, but there's no way in heck she'd be allowed to do so. Even most MIDWIVES around here can't deliver babies (assuming an uncomplicated vaginal birth) in hospitals -- and that's not even surgery! CNMs can't do D&Cs to my knowledge, either -- I was seeing a CNM in a hospital setting during my second pregnancy; when my missed miscarriage was diagnosed, an OB performed the D&C, NOT my CNM or an RNP.

It just baffles me how PPAZ could possibly claim to be a proponent of "safe" abortion practices when they object to having licensed physicians perform SURGERY.

Anyway.

3. I'm having a weird pregnancy craving today - Pop Tarts! I haven't had any in ages, but I think I'll make a grocery store run on my lunch break and grab some.

4. We're still loving our new Keurig. Even the kids love it -- Collin showed Elanor how to make hot chocolate all by herself (and she can do it, too -- that's how easy it is to use!), so that's become her favored drink with supper. When I registered the brewer, Keurig.com sent me a coupon for two free boxes of pods (22ct-24ct) with the purchase of two, so we took advantage of that this week and ordered four more boxes. Shipping was free, so with the coupon we ended up getting four boxes of coffee pods (about $15 each) for less than $30 total.

5. Speaking of Elanor, her first week of school has gone extremely well. She's had no issues with going to/from school (we had trouble with that last year) and her teacher reports that every day has been a great day for her. Homework starts next week so we'll see if that continues...

6. Collin felt the baby kick on Tuesday evening! We were watching a movie and he had his hand on my abdomen; sure enough, baby kicked several times hard enough for him to feel. :) I haven't had any luck getting the kids to feel yet -- Baby seems to quiet down whenever his/her siblings are around -- but I'm sure that'll come soon enough.

7. It's been a long workweek. I feel like hanging this on my door and going home:

Ah, well, at least Collin and I will have both Saturday AND Sunday together this weekend. I'm so happy he has both weekend days off again! Maybe I can make it to Confession on Saturday (LONG overdue...)

Have a great weekend!

40 Days for Life Fall 2011 Campaign

2011-08-11T08:33:00.005-07:00

The next 40 Days for Life campaign will be September 28 to November 6.

There are SIX (!) locations in Arizona this year:

Chandler

Flagstaff

Glendale

Goodyear

Phoenix

Tucson

I usually pray at the Glendale location, but I may pray at the Phoenix location this year as well, given that it's fairly close to where I work. We need prayerful witness in front of abortion clinics, so please consider signing up!

To find a list of locations near you, visit http://www.40daysforlife.com/location.cfm

We Interrupt this Blog for a Commercial Advertisement

2011-08-06T07:00:00.011-07:00

"Coffee: the finest organic suspension ever devised."
Captain Kathryn Janeway, Star Trek: Voyager

I was going to put this in my Quick Takes yesterday, but I decided it really deserves a post of its own.

Our old coffee maker has been on its last legs for some time, so we finally broke down and purchased a new one last weekend. Rather than buying another $30 Mr. Coffee, we decided to upgrade a bit and bought one of these:

It's a Keurig Signature Brewer, and we found a fantastic deal at Sam's Club - the brewer itself (normally $149.95), THREE boxes of coffee pods (normally $11.99 each), a water filter (normally $17.95), AND a "K-Cup" filter (for using ground coffee instead of the pods - normally $14.99), all for $129.98 plus tax! That's a savings of $88.88 (which more than pays for our yearly membership fee!). We also bought a 1-year replacement plan from Sam's Club ($9.99), just in case.

We've used it for a week now, and we absolutely LOVE it. It's so much easier for both of us to grab a quick cup of coffee before work; we don't have to wait 30 minutes or more for it to brew, and we don't have to smack its side if it stops brewing mid-cycle (that's what our old coffee maker was doing, despite being cleaned out with vinegar twice -- like I said, last legs), nor are we pouring cold, unused coffee down the sink if we made too much.

Whenever one of us needs a quick hit of caffeine (well, Collin more than me, as I try to limit myself to a cup a day while pregnant), we can make a hot, perfect cup in about a minute. No fuss, no muss, and no old, yucky, messy coffee grounds to throw away. (Have I ever mentioned the time Violet fished an old coffee filter out of the garbage and threw it on the floor, and wet coffee grounds got EVERYWHERE?)

We also bought some hot chocolate and chai latte pods so we don't OD on too much caffeine in the evenings.

It's been a fantastic investment so far. I love taking good coffee to work in the morning (as opposed to the mediocre stuff in the breakroom).

So, yes. Here ends my commercial pitch, and I promise that I'm not getting any kickbacks from Keurig or Sam's Club. :)

7 Quick Takes Friday - August 5, 2011

2011-08-05T08:32:00.002-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. Please say a prayer for Cam today.

2. We met Elanor's new teacher, "Mrs. E.," last night. She is a lovely woman and has been a teacher for 20 years. She and Elanor hit it off well, and I'm glad I mentioned Elanor's diagnosis of autism last year and IEP because her teacher had no idea Elanor would be receiving special ed services! Anyway, I think the beginning of this school year should go a lot more smoothly than last year. We're going to buy her school supplies this weekend so she'll be all ready for her first day on Monday.

3. William is having a lot of fun at T-ball, especially since uncle Chaun (who's been taking him every Saturday) and Grandpa Keith teamed up and bought him his very own glove, bat, baseball hat, and his own T-ball stand! God bless generous relatives. :)

4. Violet is 17 months old today! I feel remiss because I haven't documented any of her words yet. (With Elanor, I kept a spreadsheet of them! Ah, the anal-retentiveness of first-time moms...) Anyway, here are some (but not all, as I'm sure I'll forget a few) of the words Violet loves to say: Mama, Daddy, Grandpa, NO!, yah (yes), shoe, book, hug ("UG! UG!"), cereal, cup, I'm done, get down, let go (from the last three phrases, can you tell she's hit that independent toddler phase??).

5. Phoenix's Institute of Catholic Theology has a GREAT lineup of classes this fall! If you're in the Phoenix area, check it out!

6. I wish I could take one of the classes above, but effective next week Collin's work schedule is changing to Monday-Thursday, with Friday-Sunday off. It's GREAT that we'll have both weekend days together again, but that means I won't be able to take an ICT class, as his schedule probably won't change until December or so. Bummer. Maybe in the spring...

7. I felt baby's kicks from outside for the first time this morning (exactly 21 weeks today!). S/he is a feisty one!

7 Quick Takes Friday - July 29, 2011

2011-07-29T08:04:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. Lately I've realized that I take far fewer pictures of the kids than I used to do; it's a combination of a slowly dying iPhone and being forgetful of the fact that I have a digital camera. Another problem is that Violet never stays still -- the vast majority of the pictures I have taken of her are blurry because she's constantly moving!

So, over the past few days I've made an effort to take more pictures of them. I haven't succeeded as well as I'd hoped, but I got a few decent ones.

2. Here is Violet sitting in her favorite chair (my grandmother Violet found it at a rummage sale for $5 and bought it for us!):

3. Here's Violet again in her chair, being a goofball by waving her feet in the air:

4. Here's Violet again, laughing at me as I'm about to plug in the camera to transfer the pictures -- she was so darn cute I couldn't resist another picture.

5. Here's William right after I transferred the pictures -- he saw me with the camera and specifically asked me to take a picture of him (he needs a haircut soon!):

6. This is Elanor last Saturday morning as we were all lounging about in our PJs with bedhead:

7. And finally, as I posted on Monday, here's the newest member of our family (I didn't take this picture, obviously!):

Isn't s/he cute??

Bonus #8: My dad asked for a video of Violet walking, so I took a short one last Saturday morning (again, while we were all lounging around in PJs and with bedhead, so just ignore the brief glimpses of me!):

Veils by Lily

2011-07-28T10:18:00.000-07:00

Okay, I know this is the second giveaway I've posted about this past week, but this one is really special -- Veils by Lily is giving away a mantilla! Her work is GORGEOUS; I've always wanted to order one of her veils (and I will one of these days -- just haven't gotten around to it yet!).

Go to Veils by Lily to enter!

Twenty-week ultrasound pictures

2011-07-25T18:58:00.002-07:00


Most of the u/s was in 2-D, but the tech switched to 3-D for the face shot! Isn't s/he adorable?

Profile + belly shot. Baby was measuring 19w6d (3 days ahead), and his/her estimated weight is 11oz.

Profile shot. S/he was dancing away the whole time, but the tech (and later my doctor) verified that everything looks perfect!

A close-up of the head. His/her profile looks similar to William's, I think, but also a little like Violet's... I'll have to post comparison pics later.

Baby foot! We brought Elanor with to the ultrasound and she was fascinated. She asked the tech if he could make this shot even bigger, and he said, "No, baby's foot is about the size of my thumbnail right now, so this is as big as I can make the picture."

Giveaway at Crafty Catholic Mamacita

2011-07-23T09:32:00.002-07:00

Edit: I WON!!!!!!

Isn't this hair clip beautiful? When I was a teenager my bedroom had a wallpaper border that was blue roses on an ivory background with silver accents. I loved it so much that I later had the exact same wedding colors!

Anyway, check it out at Crafty Catholic Mamacita's blog!

7 Quick Takes Friday - July 22, 2011

2011-07-22T08:35:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. We did get to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II on Tuesday -- in 3-D, no less. It was very strange at first because whoever was running the projector accidentally loaded the non-3D version, so they had to stop the movie about 10 minutes in and restart it.

Anyway, I thought they did a great job. It definitely had a quicker pace than Part I. My only quibble was with the Harry vs. Voldemort showdown scene -- they did a few different things than happened in the book version, and I frankly liked the book version better. But overall, great movie.

2. We saw Winnie-the-Pooh over the weekend as well. Great film for families! All of us enjoyed it (except Violet -- she didn't pay much attention to the movie, but she enjoyed the popcorn and trying to escape from our row).

3. Does anyone else think that car seat shopping must be one of the circles of hell? I HATE IT. A piece broke off of Violet's car seat (which has been through three kids now, so it's not altogether surprising) so we had to go looking for a new one. We finally found one we both agreed on but it wasn't in stock anywhere we went. I finally found it at a Target near where I work. (On clearance even, w00t!) But throw in two disgusting diapers, courtesy of William & Violet + a forgotten diaper bag = not very much fun, and a much later night than anticipated (we didn't get home until 11pm, ugh, and I was up the next morning at 4am for work).

4. William started T-ball last Saturday and had a great time. He apparently hasn't gotten the hang of running bases yet, but I'm sure he'll figure it out eventually.

5.

But who's counting? :)

6. I had Subway's new pulled pork sub for lunch the other day and it was really, really good. Señor/ita Cuatro wholeheartedly approved.

7. Speaking of Señor/ita Cuatro, I have my 20-week ultrasound on Monday! I'm looking forward to getting another peek at him/her. We're still set on not finding out his/her sex, but it'll be fun to see him/her nonetheless. Collin MAY be able to come with, but given that OS Lion just came out, it's iffy. Even if he is able to come, I still think we'll bring Elanor with; I think she'll get a kick out of being able to see her new brother or sister.

Be sure to check back on Monday; I'll post pictures!

7 Quick Takes Friday - July 15, 2011

2011-07-15T10:02:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

I was going to do a regular ol' Quick Takes today, but then I read Rebecca's Quick Takes about her favorite Harry Potter moments. She's inspired me to present my favorite quotes from each book. Since I'm at work and don't have access to my books, I took advantage of WikiQuote's resources.

(Note: I won't be able to see HP 7-II until Tuesday afternoon, so no spoilers in the comments! Also, if you are one of the few people who have not yet read the series but intend to, the quotes below may contain spoilers.)

Elanor, five months old, rocking her Harry Potter glasses

1. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone (one of these days I really need to do a rant on how idiotic it was that the title was changed for U.S. publication because, apparently, U.S. readers are too dumb to know or understand what "Philosopher" means...ahem):

"Humans do have a knack for choosing precisely those things which are worst for them." - Albus Dumbledore

"'The truth.' Dumbledore sighed. 'It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution.'"

"Your mother died to save you. If there is one thing Voldemort cannot understand, it is love." - Albus Dumbledore

(Obviously, The Man With Two Faces was my favorite chapter...)

2. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets:

"Hearing voices no one else can hear isn't a good sign, even in the wizarding world." - Ron Weasley

"Never trust anything that can think for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain." - Arthur Weasley

"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." - Albus Dumbledore

3. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban:

"I don't go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me." - Harry Potter

"If you made a better rat than a human, Peter, that's not much to boast about." - Sirius Black

"What was there to be gained by fighting the most evil wizard who has ever existed? Only innocent lives, Peter." - Sirius Black

4. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire:

"Remember Cedric. Remember, if the time should come when you have to make a choice between what is right and what is easy, remember what happened to a boy who was good, and kind, and brave, because he strayed across the path of Lord Voldemort. Remember Cedric Diggory." - Albus Dumbledore

"Mrs. Weasley set the potion down on the bedside cabinet, bent down, and put her arms around Harry. He had no memory of ever being hugged like this, as though by a mother." [This bit makes me cry... every. single. time.]

"What's comin' will come, and we'll meet it when it does." - Rubeus Hagrid

5. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix:

"One person can't feel all that at once, they'd explode." - Ron Weasley

"Ron, just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have." - Hermione Granger

"[To Harry, about the Thestrals] I've been able to see them ever since my first day here. Don't worry, you're just as sane as I am." - Luna Lovegood

Fred Weasley: "Give her hell from us, Peeves."

Narrator: "And Peeves, who Harry had never seen take an order from a student before swept his belled hat from his head and sprang to a salute as Fred and George wheeled about to tumultuous applause from the students below and sped out of the open front doors into the glorious sunset."

6. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince:

"Don’t you see? Voldemort himself created his worst enemy, just as tyrants everywhere do! Have you any idea how much tyrants fear the people they oppress? All of them realize that, one day, amongst their many victims, there is sure to be one that rises against them and strikes back!" - Albus Dumbledore

"Dumbledore says people find it far easier to forgive others for being wrong than being right." - Hermione Granger

"But he understood at last what Dumbledore had been trying to tell him. It was, he thought, the difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to the death and walking into the arena with your head held high. Some people, perhaps, would say that there was little to choose between the two ways, but Dumbledore knew — and so do I, thought Harry, with a rush of fierce pride, and so did my parents — that there was all the difference in the world."

(Honorable mention - this part cracks me up every time!): [Harry] Yes. [Snape] Yes, sir. [Harry] There's no need to call me "sir", Professor.

7. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows:

Minister Scrimgeour: "You may wear that scar like a crown, Potter, but it is not up to a seventeen year-old boy to tell me how to do my job! It's time you learned some respect!"

Harry: "It's time you earned it."

"Luna had decorated her bedroom ceiling with five beautifully painted faces: Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Neville. They were not moving as the portraits at Hogwarts moved, but there was a certain magic about them all the same; Harry thought they breathed. What appeared to be fine golden chains wove around the pictures, linking them together, but after examining them for a minute or so, Harry realized that the chains were actually one word, repeated a thousand times in golden ink: friends...friends...friends...friends... Harry felt a great rush of affection for Luna."

"It is a curious thing, Harry, but perhaps those who are best suited to power are those who have never sought it." - Albus Dumbledore

"Gay, Catholic, and Doing Fine"

2011-07-12T04:22:00.000-07:00

Leila at Little Catholic Bubble has a must-read guest post on her blog, written by a Catholic man who is also gay and celibate. Check it out!

Response to Maya

2011-07-09T18:53:00.003-07:00

Commenter Maya, who I know from a secular message board, left a series of comments on last week's post that really deserve their own post in response due to their length and depth. I've put Maya's comments in green so that it's easier to distinguish her words from my response.

Maya, once again, thank you for being respectful and courteous in your response. Your civility is very much appreciated.

The reason your words provoked outrage is precisely because, to many people, myself included, the term "objectively disordered" is offensive in the extreme. It suggests something is fundamentally wrong with a person, and is often used to describe conditions of great deviancy, such as pedophilia. Surely you can appreciate how, no matter the distinction between sin and sinner, why that phrase in particular would be cause for a great deal of anger and outrage? If you're not calling homosexuals objectively disordered, why use a quote that describes the condition of homosexuality as such?

Straight off the bat, I'm confused. In the same paragraph (by my interpretation), you acknowledge that I have only called homosexuality an objectively disordered inclination, but then you also say that I have called homosexual people objectively disordered. I have done the former, but not the latter.

If this phrase causes anger and outrage, it's because it's not properly understood. All sin is objectively disordered. Adultery is objectively disordered. Premarital sex is objectively disordered. In the same token, all people have disordered inclinations. Something is fundamentally wrong with all of us. It's called sin, and no one is immune from it. The Catholic term for this is concupiscence. For some people, these inclinations come in the form of same-sex attraction. For others, an inclination to promiscuity or extra-marital sex, or an inclination toward deviant sexuality such as pedophilia and bestiality. For others (like myself) gluttony, anger, sloth, envy and pride. For others, it's a genetic predisposition to alcoholism or drug abuse.

Saying that homosexuality (or gluttony, or alcoholism) is objectively disordered is a reflection on the disorder itself, not the person who has that disorder. We can't necessarily always help what disordered inclinations we have, but we can control how we act in response to them. Thus, there is the Catholic distinction between homosexual inclinations and homosexual acts. It is not sinful to have a disordered inclination. It is sinful to act upon that inclination.

Furthermore, if you believe that homosexuality is not a choice, then yes, it does become rather more complicated to separate out "hating the sin but loving the sinner" as the two become inextricably linked. Obviously we are never going to agree on the point of whether or not homosexuality is a biological orientation or a choice, but at least try to understand where people's anger and outrage is coming from instead of feigning surprise at their reactions.

I wasn't "feigning surprise" at anyone's reactions. I honestly WAS surprised, and I asked for evidence that my words were, specifically, "hateful, bigoted, and vitrolic" as those were the accusations leveled at me. To me, those terms describe someone like Fred Phelps, who believes that anyone with same-sex attraction should be publicly flogged and executed and attempts to desecrate the funerals of soldiers and Catholic murder victims in order to pontificate his disgusting viewpoints.

Again, I was very surprised that I could post this and have it called hateful, bigoted, and vitrolic:

It is deplorable that homosexual persons have been and are the object of violent malice in speech or in action. Such treatment deserves condemnation from the Church's pastors wherever it occurs. It reveals a kind of disregard for others which endangers the most fundamental principles of a healthy society. The intrinsic dignity of each person must always be respected in word, in action and in law.

It's hateful to say that violent malice in speech and action against homosexual persons is deplorable? Really? All people have intrinsic dignity and worth. The disordered inclinations that each person may have has no bearing on their intrinsic dignity as a human being.

As to your arguments about incest and pedophilia. Incest doesn't technically harm anyone if the two adults involved are consenting, but there's issues of whether or not that consent can be genuine, for a start. I have my doubts whether it ever can be truly consensual, but aside from issues of consent, there's the fact that closely related biological individuals procreating vastly increases the risk of serious genetic conditions. [note from JoAnna: bolding mine]

Regarding the bolded portion -- one argument of same-sex marriage advocates seems to be that reproduction should have nothing to do with marriage. At least one commenter on the last post asked why infertile or post-menopausal heterosexuals weren't denied marriage, for example. If this is the case, why should the couple's ability to sexual reproduce make any difference to same-sex marriage advocates, whether or not the couple is homosexual or biologically related?

Another issue -- one of the only ways that homosexual couples can have children is via IVF, but the CDC states that children conceived via IVF may have a significantly higher chance of birth defects than children conceived naturally. I'm assuming, however, that these statistics aren't significant enough for you to feel that IVF should be banned.

Either the potential for sexual reproduction has nothing to do with marriage, or it has everything to do with marriage. It can't go one way for homosexual couples and another way for consenting incestuous couples. Would you support marriage for incestuous couples if and only if both were voluntarily sterilized or post-menopausal?

As for pedophilia, really? Pedophiles might be "born that way," but their victims are unable to consent.

Why is consent the sole criterion of the good? I happen to think that a lot of things that happen between consenting adults is deplorable and immoral. Adultery, for example.

Neither of these conditions holds true in a consensual, adult, homosexual relationship. It's also deeply offensive to me to relate homosexuality to incest and pedophilia, even for the purposes of making an analogy (however poor I think it may be), and many others feel the same.

I'm sure they do, but at the same time there are parallels. It's true that homosexual relationships do not typically involve child abuse, but the fact is that both homosexuals and pedophiles claim they were "born that way" and that their sexual proclivities should be condoned, encouraged, and even celebrated. NAMBLA keeps lobbying to lower the age of consent and present arguments that teenagers, and even young children, CAN consent to sex. (Obviously, I disagree...) Two doctors, in testifying before the Canadian parliament, claimed that pedophilia was a sexual orientation no different than homosexuality or heterosexuality. The line is getting blurry, and that's worrisome.

Saying that homosexual inclinations and pedophiliac inclinations have a similar genesis (in that they both may be genetic in nature) is not saying that homosexuals are no different than pedophiles, but that seems to be the first assumption to which everyone leaps.

In your reply to Hannah above, you say that she has misrepresented or misunderstood your words, and that "gays can't procreate so they don't need marriage." In your earlier entry on the NY vote, however, you wrote this: "As homosexual couples are, by nature and design, unable to naturally procreate, the privileges are unnecessary." I understood privileges in the second part of the sentence to refer to the privilege of marriage, which you referenced earlier. If that sentence is not stating that, since homosexual couples cannot procreate naturally, that they do not need the privileges of marriage, then what were you trying to say?

I was trying to say that it is patently unnecessary to radically change and alter the institution of marriage in order to grant certain legal protections to individuals. To quote from a Vatican document about this issue:

Nor is the argument valid according to which legal recognition of homosexual unions is necessary to avoid situations in which cohabiting homosexual persons, simply because they live together, might be deprived of real recognition of their rights as persons and citizens. In reality, they can always make use of the provisions of law – like all citizens from the standpoint of their private autonomy – to protect their rights in matters of common interest. It would be gravely unjust to sacrifice the common good and just laws on the family in order to protect personal goods that can and must be guaranteed in ways that do not harm the body of society. [emphasis mine]

In your [message board post] and here, you also cited a secular article in defense of your position. However, had you returned to the thread, you would have seen that Halfwright challenged this statement. "The second author has written several books on how government should enforce morality (his morality, of course).

Oh, so the government should enforce her morality instead? I find this argument amusing, frankly. Law is, essentially, the morality of the majority being enforced upon everyone else. In democratic societies, it all depends on who makes the most persuasive case that their morality is the one that should be imposed.

The first author has written (religiously-based) letters to the editor about abortion and wrote his senior thesis on the (moral) dangers of premarital sex. At least two of them are very devout Catholics -- the first page of google turned that up easily -- and write frequently about the issue from a faith-based approach. Religion absolutely informs their views. Though they might not reference religion specifically (and they even try their hardest to stay away from it), I'd argue that religion is front and center in that piece. The vehicle might be secular, but to claim that his religious leanings have no bearing on his opinion is, to me, disingenuous. It is not a wholly secular piece against gay marriage if the author has that kind of publishing background.

I find this viewpoint -- that if one's views are influenced by religion, their arguments are therefore invalid -- extremely bigoted, frankly. In fact, it's very theophobic. You acknowledge that the arguments do not appeal to a religious perspective. Shouldn't those arguments be judged, then, on their own merits as opposed to judged on the basis of the religious background of the persons making them? I personally believe that it is wrong to automatically discount someone's arguments on the sole basis of their religious (or non-religious) background. For example, I don't automatically discount Christopher Hitchens' beliefs on the basis of his atheism: I reject them because I believe they are both uninformed and illogical.

You also assert in your previous post that you do not need to be married to someone to, for instance, be able to will your property to them upon your death. No, you do not, this is true. However, in the event you do not take extra legal steps to specify that you wish this to happen, the state will automatically assume that your property will go to your husband.

Actually, in the U.S., this varies depending on state law. Not all states are community property states. Arizona is a community property state, but my husband and I also have a will (drawn up by a lawyer and duly notarized) specifying that if one of us dies the other one inherits all possessions and property, just in case that ever changes.

Gay couples suffer through countless little slights each day that to me, are unnecessary. Why should they have to fight legally and jump through hoops (or sometimes even be denied the ability to jump through hoops) to obtain the same privileges conferred automatically upon heterosexual couples?

Why should the institution of marriage have to be radically altered -- indeed, redefined -- in order for these rights to be conferred upon two individuals who wish to specify disposition of joint property upon the death of one of them?

To use a real example, in the thread, Jemma mentioned just one way in which the exclusion of considering homosexual couples to be legally wed in Pennsylvania has affected her family. Her wife works at the university her daughter attended, but "My daughter attended that university and, for her first three years, she had to pay tuition, whereas the step-children of straight couples do not. That little example cost my family about $20,000. By her final year, my wife's union had won same-sex benefits. That's just one small example." To me, this is wrong.

Well, here's another example. When I first attended college, I lived with my mother and stepfather. Because I did, my stepfather's income was considered my "household income" when it came to federal financial aid. My mother and father, individually, made very little income; my stepfather's income was significantly more. Because my stepfather's income was considered my household income even though he was not paying for any part of my college tuition, I received very little financial aid from my university and had to take out significant private student loans in order to attend college, a situation that to this day has negatively affected my credit.

Would you support abolishing marriage altogether, or abolishing remarriage after divorce, so that other people in my situation can receive better financial aid packages? I'm guessing no. In my opinion, the answer would have been to change rules of that university should be changed so that step-children of heterosexual employees also have to pay tuition, or go by different criteria altogether, not to radically redefine marriage so that someone can have a better financial situation.

If we as a society hold that the ideal relationship legally is two people, bound to each other by law to the exclusion of all others, then the benefits of that legal relationship should extend to any in a similar situation, regardless of the genders involved.

But that's not what marriage is or why the government is in the business of recognizing marriages. Steven Greydanus just published a series of articles called Redefining Marriage that goes into this in more detail, but this is the excerpt that really sums it up well:

Recently in an online forum a same-sex marriage advocate wrote to me, “I’ve never once had any conservative be able to tell me how the legalization of gay marriage affects, in any measurable way, their relationship with their spouse.”

My response was: “I’ve never once had any same-sex marriage advocate be able to offer a coherent account of what marriage is and is not, and why it is the state should have a bureaucratic apparatus for certifying (and decertifying) sexual partnerships involving two and only two non-related adults in any gender combination.”

And what about when civil unions and domestic partnership laws become discriminatory? Take the case of Joyce and Sybil Burden, two sisters in a platonic relationship (i.e., non-incestuous) who applied for a British civil union in order to get the estate tax benefit, so that if one of them died the other wouldn't lose their family home. However, they were denied, because the final court of appeal essentially ruled that civil unions only applied to women who weren't biologically related. I think this situation is unfair under Britain's current laws, frankly. If they're going to give a civil union to two lesbians, why not to two post-menopausal sisters in a platonic relationship?

I've also never been able to understand, nor received, a satisfactory answer as to what changes when one partner in a homosexual relationship undergoes a sex change, transforming the couple into a heterosexual one. Suddenly, they are allowed to marry, yet they are not able to naturally procreate, so would they also be denied the ability to marry in your worldview? I'm genuinely curious.

In my view, such a couple should be denied marriage, because I believe one cannot "change" into a different sex. One can have plastic surgery and take hormones so that he or she resembles the opposite sex, but a DNA analysis will still prove that he or she is genetically the sex he or she was at birth. Thus, the union would be a homosexual one, not a heterosexual one, and natural reproduction is impossible by design.

I will return to read your reply, but I don't know that I'll feel compelled to comment again. However, just this once, I decided to give it my best shot at explaining why I feel the way I do, and attempting to get you to see why your remarks would provoke such anger and hostility on the board.

I very much appreciate your willingness to dialogue, and once again I appreciate the civility that you displayed.

7 Quick Takes Friday - July 8, 2011

2011-07-08T08:35:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I had a prenatal appointment on Tuesday. Baby's heartbeat was 150bpm, everything else looked great. We scheduled the anatomy ultrasound for July 25! Sadly, Collin won't be able to be there; he has to work that day and it's unlikely he'll get it off. I think I'll take Elanor instead and we can have a special mommy/daughter afternoon together. I think she'll like getting a sneak peek at her new brother or sister.

2. Collin and I had our first date eleven years ago yesterday! We celebrated on Tuesday afternoon by going to my appointment together, getting a couple's massage at our favorite massage place, then grabbing a quick meal together at Olive Garden. I adore their chicken scampi.

3. My boss' last day of work is today (she's moving back to her hometown) so after work our whole department is taking her out for happy hour at a local restaurant. I haven't been to happy hour with co-workers in... I can't even remember the last time. We're sad to see her go but it should be a fun time socializing before she takes off.

4. Speaking of socializing, I went to a blogger meet-up yesterday afternoon!! Leila (Little Catholic Bubble) Nicole (Mom and Then Some) and I went out for coffee, and WE HAD A BLAST! It was the fastest three hours of my life! We talked, and talked, and talked some more. It was such a blessing and such a balm to my soul to be able to spend time with two such beautiful, intelligent, faithful Catholic women. Plus, I got to see Leila's house (gorgeous) and meet some of her family (also gorgeous).

Here's a picture of us hanging out! (L to R: Me, Nicole, Leila)

5. In a related note to my Saturday post regarding same-sex marriage, Steven Greydanus wrote an excellent article for the National Catholic Reporter on the issue of Redefining Marriage. He put in two paragraphs what I was basically trying to say in my entire post:

Recently in an online forum a same-sex marriage advocate wrote to me, “I’ve never once had any conservative be able to tell me how the legalization of gay marriage affects, in any measurable way, their relationship with their spouse.”

My response was: “I’ve never once had any same-sex marriage advocate be able to offer a coherent account of what marriage is and is not, and why it is the state should have a bureaucratic apparatus for certifying (and decertifying) sexual partnerships involving two and only two non-related adults in any gender combination.”

6. We discovered a wonderful new place to eat over the holiday weekend, thanks to my BIL and SIL... L & L Hawaiian Barbecue. For you that live in Phoenix, this is the location we went to, although I believe there's one in the Tempe/Gilbert area as well. The food was phenomenal!!!

7. Violet got into the pantry the other day and managed to knock a glass jar of pickles of the shelf. Guess it's time to find a lock for the pantry! I think we'll get a couple of these.

Have a great weekend!

Hateful, bigoted, and vitrolic - huh?

2011-07-02T10:52:00.002-07:00

In addition to this post a few days ago, I posted the following on a (rather liberal) message board (one about baby naming, but that has other boards for off-topic discussion) of which I am a member, in a thread about whether one could be opposed to same-sex marriage and not be "anti-gay" (the post below is slightly redacted from its original form, as I omitted a reply to another member's post):

My views on same-sex unions are found in this article from the Harvard Journal of Law and Public Policy (it is not written from a religious perspective, but rather a secular one).

This is a good explanation (written by a gay man) on why Christian teaching on homosexuality has never rested on proof-texting Leviticus 18:22: The God Hates Shrimp Fallacy

As for me, I oppose same-sex marriage but I am not "homophobic" or "anti-gay." I fully agree with this:

It is deplorable that homosexual persons have been and are the object of violent malice in speech or in action. Such treatment deserves condemnation from the Church's pastors wherever it occurs. It reveals a kind of disregard for others which endangers the most fundamental principles of a healthy society. The intrinsic dignity of each person must always be respected in word, in action and in law.
source

And this:

2358 The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition.
source

I can differentiate between behavior and actions and people. I can object to the former without disparaging or discriminating against the latter.

I didn't stick around to see the responses to this post, as I have neither the time nor the patience for a debate in which it'd be 42 against 1 and I'd no doubt be called names and repeatedly insulted. However, a Facebook friend who is also a member of the board sent me a message in which she accused both the above post, and other comments in the same vein I'd made on FB, as being full of "hatred, bigotry, and vitriol." She is also Catholic (although one who apparently rejects Church authority on a number of issues), and she asserted that God did not share my opinion on same-sex marriage and that she was ashamed that I was Catholic. (If she gives me permission to share her exact words, I'm happy to do so as I have no desire to misrepresent her words, but as I don't have that permission at the moment I can only summarize.)

I replied to her message with the following (again, slightly redacted to omit a few details I'd rather not share on this blog):

Hatred? Bitterness? Vitriol? I have no idea where you're getting any of that. I do not hate anyone, nor am I a bigot, and I'm honestly puzzled as to how anything I've said or posted reflects hate and bigotry.

What have I said that expresses hate, bitterness, or vitriol? I'm honestly puzzled and would appreciate some clarification on this. I don't hate homosexuals. I think homosexual ACTS are sinful, yes, but that does not equate to "hating" homosexuals. All human beings have inherent dignity and worth, and value.

Where have I said that I hated homosexual people? Where have I said that homosexual people deserve to die, or should die, or should be horsewhipped in the streets? Where have I said that homosexuals should be shot on sight? Where have I ever said that homosexuals are going to hell or should go to hell?

THAT is what hatred and bitterness and vitriol is. If you don't believe me, head over to Fred Phelps' site sometime so you can see what hate REALLY is and how it manifests.

Again, I would like for you to quote something I've said that you see as hateful so I can try to understand why you feel this way, because I honestly don't get it.

As for my Catholicism, I follow what the Church teaches. I believe Jesus Christ established the Church and gave the Church that authority to teach and to bind and loose (that is, to determine what is moral and what is not moral). I believe that Truth is not established by majority vote, and I believe that the Church teaches the truth, infallibly, in terms of faith and morals.

You reject that authority on many issues and that's your choice, but I am following Christ to the best of my ability. Christ was able to separate the sinner from the sin. He could love the sinner while telling them to "Go and sin no more." I try to follow His example, and I don't hate anybody -- homosexuals included.

For example, a family member committed adultery during her marriage. I love her, very much, and always will. But I will NEVER support, condone, or encourage adultery -- her acts of adultery or anyone else's. I love her, but I hate the sin she committed because it ripped her family apart. Can't you see that? Can't you see how it's possible to hate the sin but love the sinner?

She's yet to reply so I'm pretty sure she's blocked me at FB (rather than respond to my very reasonable questions -- how very open-minded and tolerant of her), but I would sincerely like to know from others who may share her opinion: please produce a quote from me, either from the above or anywhere on this blog, that you consider "hateful," and why.

I don't think it is "hateful" to assert that marriage is not a right, but a privilege. If it is "hateful" then I must also hate pedophiles, incestuous couples, polygamists, those who practice bestiality, and so on, because I don't think they entitled to marriage by virtue of their sexual preferences either.

The Oxford English Dictionary defines "hatred" as "intense dislike or ill will." This definition, for me, applies to homosexual ACTS but NOT homosexual PEOPLE! I bear no intense dislike or ill will to homosexual people, at all.

I do NOT believe anyone, homosexuals included, should be denied basic human rights as listed by the United Nations.

Regarding Article 16 of the above, it states the following:

(1) Men and women of full age, without any limitation due to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and to found a family. They are entitled to equal rights as to marriage, during marriage and at its dissolution.

(2) Marriage shall be entered into only with the free and full consent of the intending spouses.

(3) The family is the natural and fundamental group unit of society and is entitled to protection by society and the State.

Note that it does NOT say, "without any limitation due to sexual preference or orientation."

I do not believe marriage to someone of the same sex is a basic human right. Marriage to someone of the opposite sex is not even a basic human right unless the persons wishing to marry fulfill all requirements of the law when it comes to marriage. Otherwise, we'd have to concede that a 52-year-old man could marry the 14-year-old he's raping.

Finally, some incredibly mature individual decided to take this argument to my ExpectNet game, and posted a guess with the handle "Gays are people too." I made a slight modification (see guess #6, unless he or she chooses to delete it), but the inherent accusation contained therein absolutely baffles me.

Where have I said - anywhere - that gays are not people? Seriously, if the person who posted that is reading this, PLEASE prove your accusation. Find a blog post or a message board post or a Facebook comment in which I said that gays were not people. In fact, I have said exactly the opposite. I have been VOCAL in my opposition to people like Fred Phelps who try to claim otherwise.

The most ironic part of this entire debate is how many proponents of same-sex marriage are also in favor of abortion on demand. They deny the basic right to life to over 50 million unborn children and I'm the one who is hateful and bigoted?

[Note: this post spawned a follow-up post in order to reply to one of the comments below; you can read it here.)

7 Quick Takes Friday - July 1, 2011

2011-07-01T08:20:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I can't believe it's July already! What happened to June?

Our July isn't getting off to a stellar start, as Elanor is running a low-grade fever and I'm staying home with her today. But hey, at least it'll give me a chance to catch up on some laundry.

2. Collin found a scorpion in his home office last Saturday. Know where it was? ON HIS FOOT. He actually shook it off twice, thinking it was a fly or something, before looking down and realizing just what was trying to crawl on him. He smashed the sucker dead and spent some time looking to see if it had friends around, but he didn't find any. We're firmly convinced that his guardian angel kept the darn thing from stinging him! (He was working at the time, too... a scorpion sting would've been a heck of a way to get off of work early!)

3. In happier and less freaky news, I'm very pleased to report that Violet is finally walking! She's been very close for a while, cruising along furniture all over the place and walking while holding on to our hands, but last weekend and this week she's grown much more confident about walking independently. At just shy of 16 months, she's my earliest walker (William didn't walk until about 18 months, and Elanor was around 21 months, but she needed occupational therapy before she started walking).

4. In some ways my pregnancy is flying by, and in other ways it's dragging. Some days I can't believe I'm already at 16 weeks (and will be scheduling my 20-week ultrasound at Tuesday's appointment!), and other days December seems so far away. (Especially when I watch shows like A Baby Story [also known as "Birth: What Not to Do, Generally"] and see uber-cute newborns snuggling with their mamas. I love newborn snuggles!) Seeing pictures of beautiful baby Pamela Scholastica has only inflamed my baby fever.

5. I wrote a fun post about baby naming for the Catholic Phoenix blog this week. We have already chosen our boy and girl names for Señor/ita Cuatro, but we're the mysterious type who don't reveal them until after the baby's birth. :)

6. I finally read (well, listened to the audiobook of) The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. I thought it was excellent. Once scene made me cry, and several others had me tearing up. Very dark, very gritty, but very compelling storyline with cliffhangers that made me catch my breath. I have a fondness for dystopian fiction and this is one of the best stories I've read. Sadly, it wasn't hard to see how the world got to the point it is at in this setting, and I have my suspicions about several upcoming plot points regarding the history as it has been related to the residents of District Twelve versus reality.

I've reserved the next book of the trilogy from the library (again, audiobook format) and can't wait to continue the story!

My one tiny pet peeve was the name of one of the main characters. I couldn't figure out why the narrator spoke with a British accent only while pronouncing one of the main characters' names. It took me a while to realize that the name was "Peeta," not "Peter"! But in my head, he's Peter and I can't shake it.

7. Our plans for the 4th of July are pretty low-key (assuming Elanor is feeling better, of course, and no one else is sick); we're going to the annual Surprise celebration, which includes a baseball game with a spectacular fireworks show afterward. We've done this every year on the 4th since we moved here, and it's always a fun time.

Have a great weekend!

A comment on the NY vote

2011-06-25T17:38:00.000-07:00

“I apologize for those who feel offended,” Mr. Grisanti said, adding, “I cannot deny a person, a human being, a taxpayer, a worker, the people of my district and across this state, the State of New York, and those people who make this the great state that it is the same rights that I have with my wife.”

- New York Times

What you say makes absolutely no sense, Mr. Grisanti, as no one was being denied rights prior to this vote. Every adult in the state of NY had the exact same rights: to marry one, non-related, unencumbered, consenting adult of the opposite sex.

Those are the exact same rights shared by you and your wife. They were not being denied to anyone before.

What you have done with this law is granted special, unnecessary privileges to a certain category of people based on their sexual preference, privileges that could have been granted by law without making a further mockery of the institution of marriage.

Please quit deluding yourself into thinking you're some sort of civil rights hero, because you aren't.

Our son: future deacon?

2011-06-25T07:47:00.000-07:00

A few nights ago, as we were getting the kids ready for bed, William picked up a rather large, hardbound book of fairy tales and held it high in front of him. "Look, I'm being Jesus!" he said, pacing back and forth.

It took a minute, but we realized he was mimicking the deacon at Mass, when he goes to read the Gospel. After we stopped laughing, we explained that the deacon was not Jesus, but rather he was proclaiming the WORD of Jesus.

Then we beamed in pride. God willing, we have a future deacon -- or priest -- in our midst!

7 Quick Takes Friday - June 24, 2011

2011-06-23T21:13:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Hallie for hosting this week while Jen is enjoying her babymoon!

1. I set up an ExpectNet Online Baby Pool for people to guess about Señor/ita Cuatro's sex, weight, birthday, etc.

Feel free to make a guess! Winner gets ~~naming~~ bragging rights. ;)

2. This week has been kind of tough pregnancy-wise. On Monday I was so dizzy I had to call in sick to work. I even went into the doctor, but he diagnosed it as a "weird pregnancy thing" and told me to push fluids, in case it was the heat. (On the up side, we got to hear baby's heartbeat again - nice and strong at 160bpm.)

Tuesday I was okay, but in the evening I became nauseous and the next day I had a headache all day which, as the day progressed, seemed to be developing into a migraine. (Thankfully, I was able to head it off with Tylenol PM and lots of sleep.) Today's been pretty good, and I'm hoping tomorrow will be as well.

3. Another weird thing that happened this week: my paycheck bounced. It turns out that the company who does my company's payroll is using a new bank, and one of the wire transfers was miskeyed, so the correct funds didn't get into the necessary account in time. I was affected, as was my boss, my boss' boss, and several of my co-workers. Luckily, we were alerted within hours of the screw-up, and Collin quickly transferred some money into our account from savings so we wouldn't overdraft. My company wired the money into our account the next day and are reimbursing NSF and wire transfer fees, so it's only a temporary annoyance instead of a big problem. Still, like I said, just one more bizarre thing in a very weird week.

4. I signed William up for T-ball yesterday! His uncle Chaun, who loves sports and has no sons of his own, has volunteered to take him. He starts July 16 and he is very excited!

5. I also got my first haircut in about six months yesterday. I didn't go very short but I took off some length (which feels much better in this heat) and added bangs and some layers. I'm pleased with how it looks.

6. My secret fantasy is to have one of those uber-short pixie cuts, something like this. However, I don't think I'll ever have the facial structure or body shape to really pull it off.

7. Finally, I leave you with this:

Makes me very excited for our upcoming vacation, even though I don't know if I'll be able to go on the new Star Tours (depends on what their restrictions are for pregnant women).

Happy Friday!

Happy Father's Day!

2011-06-19T19:09:00.000-07:00

We have had a lovely day so far. We went to Mass, then to Collin's favorite Mexican restaurant for lunch, then to a movie (we saw Kung Fu Panda 2, which was very good) and now we're at home, about to grill steaks, have some cake, and have Collin open his gifts. I called my dad already, and Collin's currently talking to his.

I'm so grateful for all of the wonderful fathers in my life, especially my spiritual fathers. On this Father's Day, I think it's particularly important that we pray for our priests.

Lord Jesus, we your people pray to You for our priests. You have given them to us for OUR needs. We pray for them in THEIR needs.

We know that You have made them priests in the likeness of your own priesthood. You have consecrated them, set them aside, annointed them, filled them with the Holy Spirit, appointed them to teach, to preach, to minister, to console, to forgive, and to feed us with Your Body and Blood.

Yet we know, too, that they are one with us and share our human weaknesses. We know too that they are tempted to sin and discouragement as are we, needing to be ministered to, as do we, to be consoled and forgiven, as do we. Indeed, we thank You for choosing them from among us, so that they understand us as we understand them, suffer with us and rejoice with us, worry with us and trust with us, share our beings, our lives, our faith.

We ask that You give them this day the gift You gave Your chosen ones on the way to Emmaus: Your presence in their hearts, Your holiness in their souls, Your joy in their spirits. And let them see You face to face in the breaking of the Eucharistic bread.

We pray to You, O Lord, through Mary the mother of all priests, for Your priests and for ours. Amen.

Our priest, Father Hans, with Violet on the day she was born.

7 Quick Takes Friday - June 17, 2011

2011-06-17T09:21:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. Quote of the Day: "I don't want a religion that accepts me for who I am. I know who I am and am unimpressed. I want a religion that calls me to be better than I am even as I resist it." ~ Matt Archbold from Creative Minority Report

2. Hello, second trimester! Some sources say 12 weeks is the beginning of the 2nd trimester, and others say 14, but no matter how you count it, I'm there, baby! (Fourteen weeks today.) The fatigue is a bit better but I'm still getting nausea from time to time -- had to take two Zofran on Tuesday, actually. Ugh. Here's hoping that dies down quickly.

3. We don't have any big plans for Father's Day... Collin might have too much homework for us to actually do any family activities together. :( Still, the kids and I have gifts for him and I'll probably cook a fancy supper (or we'll go out; he hasn't decided which he'd prefer) on Sunday. We'll also attend Mass, of course. We just received Inception via Netflix so maybe he and I will watch that on Saturday or Sunday after the kids are in bed.

4. I put on a maternity shirt this morning and was reminded of what seems to be the cardinal rule of maternity clothing: if a shirt is size XL, some manufacturers assume that the woman also has XXXXXXXL breasts. Thank goodness for Cami Secrets and safety pins.

5. Elanor has learned a new phrase: "But I didn't mean to!" She seems to think she can say it after being naughty and it excuses her from suffering the consequences of her actions. Not so, little girl, not so.

6. This made me chuckle:

7. Hey, did you know you can opt out of getting paper phone books? It's true!

Happy Friday!

A wonderful quote

2011-06-15T15:00:00.000-07:00

Leila made a comment at her blog recently, and it was so wonderful and uplifting that I just have to share:

Children, every single one, are a complete and utter blessing. They are a gift from God to their families, their nations, the world. They are the hope and reason for our future. They are always a good, never an enemy. They are good for this world, and our greatest resource. They are made in the very image and likeness of God. I honestly can't think of any earthly thing better than a new baby.

All I can say is: Amen!

Our Harry Potter Love Story

2011-06-13T20:45:00.003-07:00

The two of us, back in the day.

Betty Beguiles is hosting an engagement stories link round-up, so I thought I'd participate!

It was a dark and stormy night...

Oops, never mind. I slipped into my English major mode for a second there. :) Anyway...

It all started one fateful day in June 2000. I was a student at the University of Wyoming in Laramie, WY, and I was still on campus because I was taking a summer class (Spanish 2030). I was in a campus computer lab, reading the latest rumors about the fourth Harry Potter book. I'd read the first book during Christmas break at the urging of my mother and my aunt Sheri; I'd been immediately hooked and ordered the second and third from Amazon in February. By that summer, I'd reread all three books a million times, was eagerly awaiting the fourth, and was a certified Harry Potter addict.

While looking for Harry Potter webpages on Yahoo! (remember, this was before the heyday of Facebook and forum-based message boards), I discovered that there were five or six Harry Potter “Yahoo! clubs” – forums where members conversed by posting messages at a common webpage. It was sort of like a message board, but more of a thread format.

I noticed one called Harry Potter for Grown-Ups, and it immediately piqued my interest. I'd wanted to join a Harry Potter web club or mailing list, but I'd been afraid that I'd wind up in the middle of a bunch of eleven-year-olds whose posts looked something like, "i lik hagrd becawse hes kewl." I was looking for conversation that was a bit more up to my level. So, I clicked on the link and started reading a few posts. I was delighted -- adults, having adult, mature discussions about Harry Potter! So, I signed up and began reading and posting messages regularly.

One day near the end of June, the group got into a discussion about why grown-ups enjoyed Harry Potter. One person thought it might be because we all wanted to revisit our childhoods, which sparked another conversation. (By the way, the entire record of this conversation is archived at the Harry Potter for Grown-Ups website, so feel free to go and look! You can search for messages by number, which is why I've provided them; I think their archives go back to 2000 and beyond.)

One member posted a message saying that she would only go back to her childhood if she could go back knowing what she knows now. I replied to her message in total agreement. My message was as follows:

Message 2949: My biggest problems in adolescence were worrying about how popular I was and how fat I was. If I could go back, I'd say to hell with society's conventions and really *live* my life without worrying about being popular or thin. I thought that because I wasn't thin, I wasn't worth anything -- thankfully, I now know that life is NOT a dress size, and I'm perfectly happy being a size 14. [Oh, to be a size 14 again...] I'm having the time of my life at college, and I have many wonderful friends who like me for ME, and not for what size I wear.

Soon, there was a reply to my post - a person by the ID of Jarnor23 (a.k.a. Collin Wahlund). His reply was as follows:

Message 2963: Oh, I'm in complete agreement about that. Waaay too many women are given this totally unrealistic idea about what a woman should look like. Personally, those uberthin women do NOT attract me. I know it might sound odd, but I actually prefer women who look like real women. There can even be something about a "flaw" that I find charming if the woman has a really beautiful personality that actually makes me feel the beauty of the woman is enhanced. And as much as the media would also like to make you think all men are steriotypical [sic] pigs who just want their supermodels, I'll bet you'll find a lot of guys who agree with this. Maybe not all, but then again, I've met some pretty superficial and shallow women too. ;)

Naturally, this reply astonished me. A man who didn't like the look of supermodels?? Who thought supermodels were too thin?? Was he for real?? The mischevious streak in me surfaced, and I replied with the following message:

Message 3019: Will you marry me? *grin*

I kid you not - that was my reply. Of course, at the time I was being facetious. However, Collin replied with:

Message 3064: Geez, I've never had a proposal before... er, how about a definite maybe? :)

I replied to that message with:

Message 3079: Sounds like a plan to me! :)

That, I thought, was the end of it. The next day, I traveled back to North Dakota, as my summer class had ended and I planned to spend the rest of the summer in my hometown. However, when I checked the board again I found his reply:

Message 3100: Sounds good by here too! So... maybe you might check your Yahoo mail for a little letter sent by electronic owl, and maybe I'll get a response back? :)

I checked my e-mail, and sure enough, there was an e-mail from Collin! After I replied, I posted the following response:

Message 3181: I just sent an e-owl in reply! :-) I think we'd better stick to owl post rather than this board for individual messages, because I think some people might be getting annoyed at us. :) Thanks for the letter!

After that, our correspondence continued via e-mail. For a solid week, we wrote e-mails back and forth, most of them 16k or more! We talked about EVERYTHING – Harry Potter, our hobbies, our likes and dislikes, etc. As it turned out, Collin had grown up in the same area I had (he'd lived in Valley City, Jamestown, and Fargo, ND, but was currently residing in Minneapolis, MN). We'd grown up about 40 miles away from one another, but hadn't “met” until we were living 850 miles apart! (Later, at our wedding, we discovered that my stepfather and his grandfather had known each other for many years, but neither of them made the connection until that day!)

During one of my e-mails I mentioned that I really wanted to go to the “Harry Potter Release Party” that the Fargo, ND Barnes & Noble was having to celebrate the release of the fourth book, but I didn't have anyone to go with and I really didn't want to go alone.

Collin surprised me by writing back and suggesting that we go together. I couldn't believe that he'd be willing to drive all the way from Minneapolis just to go to a Harry Potter party with me, but he insisted that it wasn't a problem. So, I said yes. We agreed to meet beforehand and go to a movie, then to the party, since the book wasn't being released until midnight and the party itself didn't start until 10pm or so.

The day we were to meet was July 7, 2000. I spent that day in Detroit Lakes with my best friend, Abbi (who was later my maid of honor), and confided in her that I had a date, and I was going to meet a guy that I'd met over the Internet. She was worried, but I assured her that we'd been talking weeks, and he didn't sound like an axe murderer. Besides, I was going to meet him in a well-lit place with plenty of people around (which is an excellent rule of thumb for meeting anyone from the Internet, by the way).

Later that evening, I drove back to Fargo and over to the mall movie theatre. We'd already exchanged pictures in prior e-mails, so I recognized him immediately. I'm not sure if it was love at first sight, but it was definitely "like" at first sight! He gave me a hug, and it felt very natural and very right. I think the thing that made me fall in love with him, though, was while we were standing in line to get our tickets (we saw the movie "Chicken Run," and it was great!). He turned to me, quite suddenly, and said, "My God, you're beautiful." I think I blushed and stammered something incredibly articulate like, "Oh, um, thank you." It was the tone, not the words, that had stunned me -– he sounded so incredibly awed and sincere.

After the movie, we went to the party at Barnes & Noble. We had a lot of fun – and we talked, and talked, and talked, and talked some more. We talked so much that we ended up sitting in his car in the parking lot until 2am! (Okay, maybe we did a little more than talking... but not much more.) ;)

I remember thinking, as I was driving home, that I had just met the man I was going to marry.

After that, we saw each other every single weekend. During one of our weekends, I accompanied him to his grandparents' fiftieth wedding anniversary party. We'd been dating about a month at that point, and I was very nervous to be meeting all of his relatives – parents, brothers, grandparents, aunts & uncles, cousins – in one fell swoop. I was especially nervous because Collin had confided in me that he'd been getting some ribbing due to our age difference – I was 19, he was 25. However, the weekend went very well, and by the end of it his grandmother had asked me to call her Grandma (something, according to Collin, she'd never asked any other girlfriend of his to do), and his aunts were giving me wedding planning tips. (Never mind that we weren't engaged...)

It's a good thing gas prices were pretty low back then, as he was driving 470 miles, round-trip, every week – until it was time for me to go back to Laramie. I found myself reluctant to go back – it was so far away from him! I loved the University of Wyoming, but I didn't want to be 900 miles away from Collin. However, via LOTS of phone calls and e-mails, and even a visit from Collin a few months into the semester, our love continued to flourish and grow. During our conversations, marriage had come up several times, but he'd said that his finances wouldn't allow him to purchase a ring for some time, so I accepted that it would be a while before we could get officially engaged.

After the semester ended, I flew to Minneapolis to spend a week with Collin before going home for Christmas. Among other things, we planned to go and see the Harry Potter exhibit at Dayton's in downtown Minneapolis. (The original building is still there, but it changed to Marshall Fields, and now I think it's Macy's?) Collin had already attended, with his aunt Cheryl & her family, and said that I had to go see it. So, the day after I arrived, Sunday, December 17, 2000, we went to see it.

There was almost no line for the exhibit, which delighted me. Collin, however, was surprised but not particularly happy about it. I wondered why, but unbeknownst to me he was incredibly nervous and wanted to spend the time waiting in line to calm his nerves!

We went through the exhibit, talking the entire time, and at the end I sighed and said, "Wow, that was fantastic!"

Collin said, "It's not over yet."

I looked around, confused, because I didn't see anything else. Collin, however, handed me his program and said, "I don't think it's in your program."

I looked at his program. He'd taped a little sheet of paper to the end that basically said the last scene was where he proposed to me.

I looked at him, and he was on one knee with a ring in his hand, saying -- something. My mind was frozen! All I could think was, "A ring! He has a ring?? He has a ring!!" (It turns out he'd borrowed the money from his aunt Cheryl, and she had helped him pick it out. It was exactly the kind of ring I loved -- small, simple, classic.)

Suddenly, it occurred to my still-frozen mind that I should say something! I blurted, "Yes, yes, of course! Yes!" and gave him a hug.

The rest, to use a cliche, is history. We called all of our friends and family that night and broke the happy news. Everyone was very happy for us (although I doubt my mother will ever get over the shock!). We went over to his aunt Cheryl's house to celebrate by playing a game of Harry Potter trivia. I, of course, kicked butt. (The winning question? "What was the spell that Ron's twin brothers gave him to try on Scabbers?" The answer: "Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow; turn this stupid, fat rat yellow.")

Collin and I were married on September 1st, 2001 (the day that Harry Potter usually returns to Hogwarts via the Hogwarts Express -- which, geekily enough, was partially the reason that we picked that date, since July 31st wasn't a Saturday!), at Our Savior's Lutheran Church in my hometown in North Dakota. We're still very much in love and very happily married. Married life has had its ups and downs -- but luckily more ups than downs! :) Baby #4 is due on December 16, and I'm hoping s/he will wait a day and arrive on December 17, which will be the 11th anniversary of our engagement.

A picture from our wedding dance -- we hadn't intended the Harry Potter theme, but Collin's aunt showed up with HP glasses and started passing them around. Most of our wedding pics feature guests in HP glasses!

7 Quick Takes Friday - June 10, 2011

2011-06-10T09:41:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I was not expecting to see the parking lot of my office building cordoned off by police tape this morning. I had park a block away and use a different entrance. As it turns out, there was a shooting at the hotel next door this morning, and it involved a person shooting at police officers. Thankfully, no one was killed. I have no idea why they had to block off our parking lot, but luckily they opened it up again an hour or two after I got here so I was able to move my car.

2. Update on Señor/ita Cuatro - I had an OB appointment on Tuesday, and got to hear Baby's heartbeat. S/he kept moving around so we never got to hear it for more than a few seconds, but the NP estimated it was 150bpm. I think I've been feeling him/her kick for the past week, too. They're not butterfly flutters, either; these are genuine kicks. I think we've got a feisty one in there. :)

3. The belly's poking out, too; I'm already in maternity clothes. I still look just fat as opposed to pregnant, but I doubt it'll be that way for long. At least I haven't gained any weight, yet -- I've actually lost about 10lbs thanks to the nausea, and it's weight I can definitely afford to lose!

4. As I mentioned last week, I did indeed write a book review for Catholic Phoenix on Ann Margaret Lewis' "Murder in the Vatican: The Church Mysteries of Sherlock Holmes." I was pleased to see that my review was also posted on the Ignatius Press blog, and the author herself commented on my piece over at CP!

5. I'm now reading "The Apostle of Common Sense," and even though I'm only a few pages in, I'm enjoying it immensely.

6. Elanor has her very first sleepover tonight! She's going to spend the night at her cousin Candyce's house. We've had Candyce over to our house to sleep over a few times, but Elly has never gone there, so this is a big event (for both of us!). I'm sure she'll do fine -- she loves going over to Uncle Chaun & Aunt Keri's house -- but I can't believe how big she's getting. I think the worst part will be dealing with the sad little boy who wants to sleep over, too.

7. My niece Adlee Beth was baptized into the Catholic Church last Sunday. Isn't she beautiful? I wish I could have been there. Yay for another sister in Christ!

Happy Friday!

7 Quick Takes Friday - June 3, 2011

2011-06-03T09:17:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. 12 weeks today! According to my BabyCenter e-mail, the baby is about two inches crown-to-rump and is the size of a lime.

I have an appointment on Tuesday and I'm hoping we'll be able to hear his/her heartbeat via Doppler. I swear I felt the baby kick yesterday, but it could have easily been something else (such as wishful thinking).

2. I have a cold. Ugh. Seems to be a summer tradition with me. I caught bronchitis when I was pregnant with Violet. My nose is all stuffed up and my sinuses hurt.

3. William has been making huge strides potty training. For the last two days, he has voluntarily gone to the bathroom in the morning and evening, without me or Collin having to take him or remind him. I'm so thankful; it'll be nice to have only one in diapers for a while.

4. How adorable is my new nephew Carter? If I had more time off I'd drive the 14 hours and go see him! What a cutie!

5. I read a marvelous book earlier this week, one I've been meaning to purchase for quite some time. I noticed it was on sale at Ignatius Press when browsing Chesterton titles, as they were having a sale on all Chesterton books on his birthday (I bought The Apostle of Common Sense) so I picked it up too. It's Murder in the Vatican: the Church Mysteries of Sherlock Holmes. I think I'll write a review of it for Catholic Phoenix, but suffice it to say that I enjoyed it tremendously.

6. Speaking of Chesterton, I had a realization the other day. Collin and I were confirmed into Catholicism on Chesterton's birthday (May 29)! How cool is that?!

7. Something else very cool - Cam is giving away one of her beautiful snoods over at A Woman's Place! Head on over there and sign up!

Happy Friday!

A conversation with my son

2011-05-30T20:25:00.000-07:00

[We're in the bathroom, because one of the cardinal laws of motherhood is that if you don't lock the door fast enough you'll have company while you pee. William is sitting on the edge of the tub.]

William: "Mommy, look, I'm Humpty Dumpty! I'm sitting on a wall!"

Me: "Oh my! Are you going to have a great fall?"

William: "No."

Me: "Well, that's good. I don't think the king has any horses or men around here."

William: [looks thoughtful] "Well, if I do fall, I'll get Woody and Buzz Lightyear to fix me!"

Me: "I guess that would work."

Eight years ago today...

2011-05-29T12:51:00.001-07:00

Collin and I were confirmed into the Catholic Church. Deo gratias!

The Basilica of St. Mary in Minneapolis, MN, our home church.
We lived within walking distance of this gorgeous building.

We were confirmed at a Thursday noon daily mass. Originally, we'd been scheduled to be confirmed on Pentecost Sunday (June 1) with the rest of our RCIA class, but we ended up having to schedule our move to North Dakota for that weekend, so we requested permission to be confirmed earlier. The priest was very accommodating. :) We were confirmed and then went out to lunch with our sponsors. It was a wonderful day!

Eight years later, we still feel so incredibly grateful that God led us to home to Rome.

7 Quick Takes Friday - May 27, 2011

2011-05-27T14:21:00.001-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I'm so excited for this weekend! Collin is between university classes and has Monday off. That means we will have two whole days (Sunday and Monday) to spend together, and he won't have schoolwork to do! Tomorrow morning I'm taking the kids to the Surprise Memorial Day parade; otherwise, we're going to stay at home and have a nice little "staycation" this weekend.

2. I'm listening to the audiobook of Before Green Gables, and while it's well written and interesting, it's also rather depressing. I expected that given the subject matter (Anne Shirley's life prior to Green Gables), but it's hard to listen to given how sad it is. I don't want to stop, though, since it is a good book. It does remind me that I want to get the new book The Blythes Are Quoted, probably on Kindle.

3. I finally got Violet's 1-year pictures back. Here are a few of my favorites (all photos were taken by Our365 Photography):

4. I'm 11 weeks today, and it still baffles me that people (e.g., pro-choice people) can say that the little child growing inside me is nothing but a "ball of cells." (Yes, I actually read a comment thread today in which a pro-choicer called an 11-week fetus a "ball of cells.")

5. Speaking of, I wrote a post for Catholic Phoenix earlier this week called, "I Can't Believe I Have to Explain This," about another baffling pro-choice belief.

6. I'm loving our new daycare. William has used the potty every day he's been there, and he's starting to do the same at home, too! At this rate, he'll be fully potty-trained by the end of summer. Woohoo!

7. In remembrance of all our deceased veterans:

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie,
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

Violet's diagnosis

2011-05-25T11:56:00.000-07:00

Violet had a follow-up appointment with the GI specialist today. His diagnosis?

Toddler diarrhea.

JUST LIKE I'VE BEEN SAYING FOR THE LAST MONTH AND A HALF.

Ahem.

All of the stool samples came back normal. All of the blood tests except one came back normal as well; the one that was abnormal showed high blood sugar but our doctor has ordered a retest as he thinks the lab might have screwed up the test. If she had high blood sugar than there should have been sugar in her stools or in a urine sample, and there was none. So, pending the results of the retest, she's absolutely fine and he's given us the green light to reintroduce dairy if we want to do so.

I'm tempted to call or e-mail our former daycare provider to let her know that she was, not surprisingly, freaking out about nothing, but I probably won't. It's water under the bridge and I'm just glad I don't have to deal with her anymore.

7 Quick Takes Friday - May 20, 2011

2011-05-20T11:11:00.002-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. I drive by a billboard like this every day on my way to work:

I'm thinking of re-engaging the timestamp feature on my digital camera, and going to take a picture of it on Sunday, just for fun. (FYI, Jimmy Akin has an excellent analysis of why the guy behind the organization predicting the Rapture tomorrow is... well... a few fries short of a Happy Meal.)

2. Have you heard the new CD by the Daughters of St. Paul, "There Can Be Miracles," yet? If not, go and listen! You can also hear several songs on Among Women podcast #96. I'm waiting for it to be available on iTunes before I buy it, but I may call our local Catholic bookstore to see if they have it in stock as well. I rarely buy actual CDs anymore as I prefer a digital format, but I may make an exception for this one -- it's that good!

3. Elanor had her last day of kindergarten yesterday! *sniff* I can't believe my baby is technically a first-grader now. She's doing a summer day-camp thing for the rest of the summer and is terribly excited about it; I think she's most excited about her brand-new Tinkerbell lunch bag.

4. I, however, am not looking forward to packing lunches four days a week for the rest of the summer. Oh well, at least the fact that she's very picky means it'll be essentially the same exact lunch all summer (PB&J sandwich on wheat bread, applesauce, chocolate milk), so I can buy in bulk.

5. Another purchase I may make fairly soon is a Bella band (or the Target-brand equivalent). Uff-da. I'm only 10 weeks; I'm not ready to give up my non-maternity jeans quite yet.

6. My house is clean, thanks to Collin's Mother's Day gift (maid service!). We had a lady scheduled to come on Tuesday but she stood us up (ugh, the perils of Craigslist, I guess), so Collin found someone else who was able to come on Wednesday. She worked very hard and did a fantastic job. I still have mountains of laundry (that's this weekend's project) but my kitchen fairly sparkles now. It's a good feeling. Anyone want to come over? :)

7. We decided, with some regret, that airfare prices being what they are, we can't really afford to fly to North Dakota this summer. :( It would cost $1500 just for the airfare -- that doesn't include the cost of renting a van (which we'd need to do), meals, etc. We could probably find family to stay with and save money on a hotel, but still... we're looking at nearly $2000 worth of expenses and I have unpaid maternity leave coming up in December, so we really can't justify the expense this year. Maybe next year, I don't know.

So, instead, we're going to take a short family vacation to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary (September 1). It coincides with our new daycare's family vacation, meaning that we would have to find alternate daycare for that week, so we decided to take advantage and go on a vacation of our own as well.

Over Labor Day weekend and a few days into the following week, we're going to visit Sea World and the San Diego Zoo. We found some fantastic hotel deals online (less than $100/night, very close to Sea World!), and we're very excited. We're also taking the kids to Disneyland for a few days (again, we found some fantastic hotel deals!), but that part is going to be a surprise for them. We'll let them think we're on our way home and then say, "Hey kids, why don't we go to Disneyland for a few days?" and watch them go into spasms of delight. :)

Have a great weekend!

Happy Syttende Mai!

2011-05-17T10:35:00.001-07:00

Syttende Mai is the Norwegian Constitution Day (the National Day of Norway) and is an official national holiday observed on May 17 each year.

It's a big deal up in North Dakota where I grew up... there are usually lutefisk suppers (can't stand the stuff myself, but I adore lefse and rommegrot) and sometimes parades.

It's also a special day for me for two reasons: (1) it's the anniversary of my college graduation (2003), and (2) the anniversary of the day I got my very first positive pregnancy test (2004). Elanor arrived the following January. :)

In celebration, check out this very cool video of the Norwegian National Guard doing amazing drills on ice.

7 Quick Takes Friday - May 13, 2011

2011-05-13T11:02:00.002-07:00

Thanks to Jen for hosting.

1. My appointment on Tuesday went very well. I saw the nurse practitioner as Tuesday is my OB's day at the hospital, and she was lovely. Friendly, personable, and a person of faith (it came up in conversation). Plus, the first thing she said as she walked in the room was, "Congratulations!" That's always pleasant to hear. :) At any rate, as I said in my previous post, baby looks GREAT. S/he is measuring right on target and has a strong heartbeat. We're very relieved. I'm also thankful there's only one -- one of the first things the NP said as she began the ultrasound was, "Hmmm, is there one or two?" and I just about had a heart attack! Turns out that the yolk sac was still visible (she thought it might be another amniotic sac at first) so it was a false alarm.

2. Funny story from the appointment -- the medical assistant asked me when my last menstrual period was. I ovulated on something like day 25 of my cycle so I did not want to tell her what my actual LMP was because it would throw off the due date by nearly two weeks. I said, "I chart my cycles so I know my exact date of ovulation. I conceived on March 25."

She looked really confused and said, "I know, but my pregnancy wheel only has LMP, not ovulation."

I suppressed a sigh and said, "According to my calculations, my due date is December 16, so put that in your wheel and put down my LMP according to that due date."

She did, and then when we had the ultrasound, the baby was measuring 8w4d and the estimated due date matched my calculations exactly. The nurse practitioner was impressed. Anyway, yay for vindication. If I'm ever a millionaire I'm going to create a line of pregnancy wheels that calculates according to LMP and ovulation and give one to every OB-GYN clinic in the country. Hello, some women are actually knowledgable about their bodies and know the date of conception!

3. Now that we've seen everything is going well so far, we're meeting our doula next week to officially hire her (e.g., sign the paperwork and everything). She was present for Violet's birth and she was FANTASTIC so we decided right away to hire her for this birth. I'm lucky I contacted her right away after I got pregnant, as she's only taking two clients in December due to the holidays.

4. This week has been MUCH better than last week. Without going into details, we gave two weeks' notice to our daycare provider on Friday due to what we felt was a breach of our trust (it's not related to her care of the kids, which is why we gave notice as opposed to pulling them out immediately). So, we spent last week and the weekend frantically searching for another daycare provider in the area who didn't charge an arm and a leg.

Well, God is SO good to us. We found a new provider (a husband and wife team, operating out of their home) willing to take all three kids (eventually :P) PLUS who will take Elanor before and after school next year! (They live about a block from her school, and they have a daughter just a year older than her that they take to/from the same school every day). That will save us some money. They have no problem with us taking eight weeks off after the baby is born, and won't require us to pay to reserve our kids' places while they're out. Oh, and they're going to really work with us to potty train William ASAP, too. :) (She said that she "loves to potty train kids" -- I think she's crazy but if she does, then she can train Violet while she's at it! :P)

They have four kids of their own (a girl and three boys, two of which are twins just a few months older than Violet) and they love all things Disney and Disneyland, just like we do, so we hit it off immediately. :)

I think their parenting style is MUCH more like my own as compared to our previous provider's (who is a very type-A helicopter parent), so we should get along well. They charge slightly more than our old provider, but the money we'll save with Elanor's care should make up for that, and it'll be more convenient to be able to drop off and pick up the kids at the same place every day. So, that situation as been resolved and it's a lot less stressful now.

5. Our new cleaning lady is coming over for the first time on Tuesday. :) Collin says she'll do laundry and organizing for us too -- I will probably take her up on that!

6. We're also getting our wills (+ advanced healthcare directives) notarized and witnessed on Tuesday; two friends from our church have agreed to witness them for us. Hopefully the documents won't be needed anytime soon, but I think they're good to have just in case.

7. Oh, before I forget, I have a new post over at the Catholic Phoenix blog. I was in full sarcasm mode when I wrote it. :)

Happy Friday (the 13th)!

We have a baby!!

2011-05-10T15:44:00.002-07:00

Only one, thank goodness. :) S/he looks great and is measuring spot-on (8w4d). Strong, beautiful heartbeat (don't know bpm).

Pics of Senor/ita Cuatro:

Close up. S/he had a nice strong heartbeat!

Here's an overview with a close-up in the lower right corner. We could see him/her waving his/her little arms!

Praise God from whom all blessings flow!